I think I could.  A year ago my uncle was killed by some moron driving an SUV who shouldn't have been driving at all.  My uncle had serious brain trauma and his kidneys whole body was rapidly shutting down.  My parents drove down to Florida along with my Aunt from Ohio who is an RN.  Since his wife died of cancer five months before it was up to them to make the decision.  My uncle was a veterinarian and always doing something.  They knew he didn't want to be in the shape he was in.  I asked my Mom who is pro-life and against euthanasia how she could do it.  She told me that she knew her brother well enough to know he was gone. 

I think if you know the person well enough you can make the best decision for them. 

Two questions:

1) Do you believe that it's ethical in cases of ABCosis or XYZitis to pull the plug?

2) Have you talked to the person whose plug is being pulled about it?  Months/years beforehand, as the case may be, and did they say "If the doctor says I'm ABCetic or XYZatic, pull the plug"?

If the answers to both questions are "yes", and the doctor concurs, you have a duty to yourself and your loved one pull it.

If the answers to both questions are "no", well, it's a small price to pay - passing your loved ones' wealth to the hospital or nursing home rather than to your heirs, and when that runs out, burning through your fellow taxpayers' wealth - to keep true to your senses of ethics.  That said, as a taxpayer, even I won't begrudge y'all a cent on the painkillers.

If the answer to #1 is "no", and the answer to #2 is "yes", you tell your friend (you are talking about this to your loved ones, right?) "Sorry, I can't do it.  Don't give me medical power of attorney.  In fact, talk to a lawyer and find a way to make sure I don't get that power, because I'm ethically obliged to keep you alive as long as I can, no matter how much pain you're in or how much money it's costing you/us."

If the answer to #1 is "yes", and the answer to #2 is "no", you curse your fate and hope that your loved one regains consciousness and lucidity for long enough to change his or her mind, hopefully in the presence of both yourself and a doctor or another reliable witness.

Writing out a will isn't something you do to take care of the people you like and snub the people you hate.  You do it because it you've got agreements with people you like, and it makes the paperwork easier for them in what's generally a sucky time. 

Ditto for living wills.  It's just a little more awkward, because you're talking about life and death, rather than mere money and property.

But as awkward as it is, if you don't know your loved one's (or ones') opinions on the subject, you don't know the answer to #2.  If it's possible that you're going to wind up with medical power of attorney over someone, and you haven't had this conversation yet, cancel your plans for a day and have the conversation, even if it takes a few hours. 

The time to have this conversation is when everybody's healthy and lucid, not when someone's wrapped their car around a tree.  Ask the questions now.  Get it in writing if you can.  But get the answers, because you must.

I don't think I could answer that unless I was in that position.  I know it's the rational thing to do in my head, but in my heart it would be hard. Especially if it was my child, I would have the mentality of wanting to lay there in the hospital bed with them every minute of every day, just waiting for something to happen. So, I don't know, hopefully I'll never be in that position.

** Good News, I just talked to my dad and his wife made the right call. My uncle has regained consciousness, and if he keeps approving he may go home.

** Good News, I just talked to my dad and his wife made the right call. My uncle has regained consciousness, and if he keeps approving he may go home.



That's great.



Cat

Wonderful news, Ninny  :)

That's great.



Cat

Wonderful news, Ninny  :)

Thanks :) I was shocked when my dad told me. my sister says she can't remember what he has other than it starts with the letter W and that it affects the kidneys and that his whole body had shut down then miraculously started back up again...He was affected by this @7-8 years ago that's when he decided to leave the priesthood after 50+ years of service and marry his housekeeper who stood by him when he was ill the first time.

Thanks :) I was shocked when my dad told me. my sister says she can't remember what he has other than it starts with the letter W and that it affects the kidneys and that his whole body had shut down then miraculously started back up again...He was affected by this @7-8 years ago that's when he decided to leave the priesthood after 50+ years of service and marry his housekeeper who stood by him when he was ill the first time.


Oh my goodness, that sounds like a full-on soap opera!

Thanks :) I was shocked when my dad told me. my sister says she can't remember what he has other than it starts with the letter W and that it affects the kidneys and that his whole body had shut down then miraculously started back up again...He was affected by this @7-8 years ago that's when he decided to leave the priesthood after 50+ years of service and marry his housekeeper who stood by him when he was ill the first time.



Could this be what it is: Wegener's Granulomatosis, or Wegener's disease. My father was diagnosed with
this about 10 years ago and it caused complete renal failure, he's been on dialysis ever since.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wegener%27s_Granulomatosis

Oh my goodness, that sounds like a full-on soap opera!

Yes it was an interesting situation when he quit the priesthood, because his mother (my grandma) was still alive and approaching her 100th b-day had to be told the news gingerly.

Great news with a little drama.

Could this be what it is: Wegener's Granulomatosis, or Wegener's disease. My father was diagnosed with
this about 10 years ago and it caused complete renal failure, he's been on dialysis ever since.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wegener%27s_Granulomatosis

I'll ask my dad next time I talk to him. I see that the brain is hardly ever affected, but my relatives said that the doctors said he was unresponsive and not aware of his surroundings, but who knows how it may affect different people.

Spoke to soon  ...... turned for the worse again...he spoke 2 days ago...now not aware of people..Wegener's Granulomatosis is what he has.

  * Update* My aunt has decided to take him off life support., so know it's just a matter of time.

  * Update* My aunt has decided to take him off life support., so know it's just a matter of time.



I am so sorry.



Cat

Ninny,
My good thoughts are with you and your family through this tough time.

I am so sorry.



Cat


Ninny,
My good thoughts are with you and your family through this tough time.

Thank You both very much.

  * Update* My aunt has decided to take him off life support., so know it's just a matter of time.


{{hugs}}

{{hugs}}

Thanks...My uncle passed away at 9 this morning. :\'( :\'(

Thanks...My uncle passed away at 9 this morning. :\'( :\'(



I'm so sorry. My condolences.

((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))



Cat

I'm so sorry. My condolences.

((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))



Cat

Thank You

Ninny, I'm so sorry.  My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

My thoughts are with you and your family ninny.  Very sorry to hear of the news.

Thanks...My uncle passed away at 9 this morning. :\'( :\'(



((((((((((( :-*))))))))))))

I'm sorry to hear this, Ninny and my good thoughts are with you.

I'm sorry to hear that news ninny

Ninny, I'm so sorry.  My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.


My thoughts are with you and your family ninny.  Very sorry to hear of the news.


((((((((((( :-*))))))))))))


I'm sorry to hear this, Ninny and my good thoughts are with you.


I'm sorry to hear that news ninny

Thank You ladies your kind words are a comfort :).It's always hard to lose someone,but knowing he is no longer suffering helps.

The funeral was Friday with Rev. Mike Hogan delivering the homily, which was full of fun memories not sad. One of the priests that was on the alter was ordained at my uncles last parish and is C.E.O. of a Canadian Catholic television network.
Rev. Thomas Rosica, C.S.B. is a Canadian Catholic priest and Basilian Father. He is the Chief Executive Officer of Canada's Catholic Salt + Light Television network, and frequent national newspaper columnist
My aunt and the Sisters of Mercy provided the music along with a young lady named Sara Mancini who did a lovely version of Ava Maria
At the end there was some sad memories given  by a granddaughter and son..memories of her"pop-pop being there since her baptism up to her entering into college..how interesting seeing as he only married her grandmother in the early 2000's..So the truth finally starts to come out, that her father,aunt & uncle may all of been fathered by my uncle who was a priest at the time, my sister said she knows for a fact that one of them is his son..Good God.
I don't want this to change how I felt about my uncle, but it has had quite an impact on me.

I wouldn't be able to personally make that decision. It's tough, because there are occasions where someone wakes up from a long coma. But if they were to have to live their life as a vegetable afterward, I would feel bad. If I ever became brain dead, I would like the plug to be pulled, because I wouldn't be able to enjoy life anyway.

Thanks...My uncle passed away at 9 this morning. :\'( :\'(


I am so sorry to hear this, Ninny. I guess he was in some kind of remission? It seems the funeral gave you a little revelation but it's cool to remember your uncle for who he was, it is quite natural for fallout to occur after a death. I had a massive row with my aunt because I didn't want to go to my granddad's funeral. In the end, I told her why I didn't care for him and what I thought of her too - it took 20 odd years but finally managed it.  :)

As for the euthanasia topic. If I was braindead and there was no hope of recovery at all, I would want someone to pull the plug. Chances are I wouldn't know I was alive anyway. If the roles were reversed and I had to pull the plug on a loved one, that would depend on the circumstances. If I knew for certain there was no way back, I would leave it for a few months and then would have to end it. My answer is probably simplified because I am thinking logically about an emotive subject but I believe that is how I would go about it.