so i remember back in college i was talking with a friend of mine -- who happened to be all hot and blonde and stuff -- and she told me a story about a first date where they met for dinner and she got so nervous she had to go out in the street and throw up. and my first thought was, if i was in the guy's situation, i would be like, 'aw, that's so sweet! i made her so nervous she threw up, because she likes me!' but it turns out throwing up on a first date is actually a big no-no.

somehow i thought of that when i read this today.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20090424/od_nm/us_kidnapping;_ylt=AgifcjoLHJoxwJZ2IcKTcTYSH9EA

kidnapping sparks massive police hunt
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BERLIN (Reuters) – A lovesick Dutch woman who made up a story about being kidnapped sparked an eight-hour police hunt across Germany that ended with her capture by a special forces unit on a sealed-off motorway.

Worried relatives alerted Dutch police about the supposed abduction around midday on Thursday after the 35-year-old sent an SMS text message telling them two Eastern European men had taken her captive in her car, authorities said on Friday.

Reports soon came in that the woman's vehicle had entered Germany, where squad cars and police helicopters fanned out in a search which spread out over three federal states.

By evening, police in Bavaria had tracked down the black Seat to a traffic jam near Wuerzburg, and shut down the motorway. Just before 9.00 p.m. (1900 GMT), the special forces team stormed the car -- and found her alone inside.

"During questioning she said she was having a relationship crisis," a local police spokesman said, adding that the hunt had cost "tens of thousands of euros" in Bavaria alone. "People need to be aware of the costs of making up stories like this."

The woman, who has since been released, is now likely to face charges in the Netherlands for faking a crime, police said.

(Reporting by Dave Graham; Editing by Louise Ireland)

so apparently she got dumped and, hoping to win him back, made up a story that she'd been kidnapped in order to make him realize how horrible life would be without her, and a massive international dragnet ensued. and so of course the first thing i think is, oh come on! how could you possibly NOT take her back? i mean, that's dedication!

so poll question: what's the weirdest thing you've ever found romantic, or the weirdest unorthodox demonstration of devotion that you've ever been wooed by when you thought maybe you should be horrified by it?  :P

Well, my ex husband, back when we were still married but I was trying to get out of it, camped out in my backyard until I would talk to him and allow him back in the house.  He actually stayed out there for so long he had to do a number two.  He did it behind my potting shed.  I should have been more disgusted but I wasn't because I was so smitten by his demnstration of devotion.

I did throw it in his face the next time I threw him out.

Does that count?

so i remember back in college i was talking with a friend of mine -- who happened to be all hot and blonde and stuff -- and she told me a story about a first date where they met for dinner and she got so nervous she had to go out in the street and throw up. and my first thought was, if i was in the guy's situation, i would be like, 'aw, that's so sweet! i made her so nervous she threw up, because she likes me!' but it turns out throwing up on a first date is actually a big no-no.

somehow i thought of that when i read this today.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20090424/od_nm/us_kidnapping;_ylt=AgifcjoLHJoxwJZ2IcKTcTYSH9EA
so apparently she got dumped and, hoping to win him back, made up a story that she'd been kidnapped in order to make him realize how horrible life would be without her, and a massive international dragnet ensued. and so of course the first thing i think is, oh come on! how could you possibly NOT take her back? i mean, that's dedication!

so poll question: what's the weirdest thing you've ever found romantic, or the weirdest unorthodox demonstration of devotion that you've ever been wooed by when you thought maybe you should be horrified by it?  :P



If I were him, I wouldn't take her back because of one thing-SHE LIED!!!! That is one thing that couldn't abide by.


BTW, on my first date with Carlos, I was so nervous that I had to go pee almost every 5 minutes. I'm sure he must have thought that I had a bladder infection or something.  :D ;D ;D ;D



Cat

If I were him, I wouldn't take her back because of one thing-SHE LIED!!!! That is one thing that couldn't abide by.


BTW, on my first date with Carlos, I was so nervous that I had to go pee almost every 5 minutes. I'm sure he must have thought that I had a bladder infection or something.  :D ;D ;D ;D



Cat


That's cute.  No one's ever made me that nervous, excited yes.  Nervous, no.  *sigh*

i'm unnaturally curious as to whether she won her man back. i keep looking for more stories on it but this story is getting precious little coverage, for some reason. no one even lists her name. i want to send her a postcard wishing her luck. i really like to think i live in a world where gambits like this work, the way they do in wacky rom-coms. but alas, she'll probably just end up with a 10,000 euro fine, a felony charge, and a restraining order from her ex-beau.

She is 35!  Old enough to have developed some man keeping smarts - and faking kidnapping does not fall under that category.  I hope the guy runs away.  To Germany if he has to.

yeah, but if it were an episode of "i love lucy" or a movie with hugh grant and ashley judd in it, it would be really cute.

Only if they were all suntanned.

My first husband (when we were dating) broke up with me 7 times in 4 months.  Once it was because he thought a former girlfriend had his baby (why that would warrant breaking up with me I still don't know.) I forget the reasons 2 - 5, but the last time he broke up with me, he called me at work and proclaimed that I had given him Herpes and that he was going to sue me.  I did not cheat on him, I was not promiscuous, although I was not a virgin when I met him (perhaps that is what he wanted?  I dunno.)  Anyways, here I am at work, trying to keep my emotions in check, and make an appointment with my doctor to get a battery of tests (I wanted proof that I did not have any disease (hence could not give anything to him.)  OK, fast forward 2 months, I give him proof and (also the previous girlfriend lied about having his child) so I guess I was the consolation prize.  For some reason I took him back and a couple months later, we were married.  I think he gave me the ultimatum, if we didn't get married, he'd be going to school and working retail at night, so there would be no time left to date him, so I should get married to him.  (OK, so maybe I was a little less confident that I would eventually find someone new... lol)  So I married him/took him back (repeatedly).  It ended in dissolution a year later.  I think now I developed a smidge more self esteem to perhaps NOT take back a guy that was that high maintenance (if I happened to be in the same situation again.)  Thankfully I'm not.  ;D

My first husband (when we were dating) broke up with me 7 times in 4 months.  Once it was because he thought a former girlfriend had his baby (why that would warrant breaking up with me I still don't know.) I forget the reasons 2 - 5, but the last time he broke up with me, he called me at work and proclaimed that I had given him Herpes and that he was going to sue me.   I did not cheat on him, I was not promiscuous, although I was not a virgin when I met him (perhaps that is what he wanted?  I dunno.)  Anyways, here I am at work, trying to keep my emotions in check, and make an appointment with my doctor to get a battery of tests (I wanted proof that I did not have any disease (hence could not give anything to him.)  OK, fast forward 2 months, I give him proof and (also the previous girlfriend lied about having his child) so I guess I was the consolation prize.  For some reason I took him back and a couple months later, we were married.  I think he gave me the ultimatum, if we didn't get married, he'd be going to school and working retail at night, so there would be no time left to date him, so I should get married to him.  (OK, so maybe I was a little less confident that I would eventually find someone new... lol)  So I married him/took him back (repeatedly).  It ended in dissolution a year later.  I think now I developed a smidge more self esteem to perhaps NOT take back a guy that was that high maintenance (if I happened to be in the same situation again.)  Thankfully I'm not.   ;D


Yeah - I made some man-decisions when I was younger that I would NOT make today.  What do you do besides live and learn?
:)

Carlos was breaking up with me just about every week. Can you say mid-life crisis?  ::)  I don't think that I did anything desperate to get him back-but he did keep coming back, and I kept taking him back. There was one point when my head was telling me to tell him to take a hike but my heart was SCREAMING!!! I listened to my heart and NEVER regretted it.




Cat

I know a guy who was in a situation like this.  He met a girl, they fell in love and got married.  Not soon after, they had a little baby girl, and a few years later, it all came crashing down.  She would often go out with her girlfriends leaving him to tend to baby.  He didn't mind so much until he discovered that her "girlfriends" was not so much girlfriends, nor 1 girlfriend, but a bartender she met in a bar with whom she had been banging on the side.  She didn't apologize for lying, but wanted him to apologize for not being a good husband.  They filed for divorce and he won sole custody, but for the sake of the child, they eventually reconcilled about a year later and are back together

If she would find comfort in the arms of another man, it obviously doesn't say much for her current man, so he's better off without her I say.  She threw it all away for a fling

I don't know If I should talk about you know who anymore but I don't really think I should take her back because of the crap she put me through over the past 3 1/2 years which caused me anxiety and stress and all of you are right and I thank you for all your help,maybe I should've seen the signs but I was too blinded by love to even notice it.She has a different life now,she is going out with a guy from plentyoffish.com and she's happy now then she was a year or so ago.We must move on and so should I.

Well, my ex husband, back when we were still married but I was trying to get out of it, camped out in my backyard until I would talk to him and allow him back in the house.  He actually stayed out there for so long he had to do a number two.  He did it behind my potting shed.  I should have been more disgusted but I wasn't because I was so smitten by his demnstration of devotion.

I did throw it in his face the next time I threw him out.

Does that count?


You kept his number 2 and threw it in his face?  ;D  (okay...I know that's not what you meant)...

I don't know If I should talk about you know who anymore but I don't really think I should take her back because of the crap she put me through over the past 3 1/2 years which caused me anxiety and stress and all of you are right and I thank you for all your help,maybe I should've seen the signs but I was too blinded by love to even notice it.She has a different life now,she is going out with a guy from plentyoffish.com and she's happy now then she was a year or so ago.We must move on and so should I.


Have you tried that site?  You might find your soulmate.  There are alot of success stories that come from that place

Have you tried that site?  You might find your soulmate.  There are alot of success stories that come from that place


More like cellmate!  :P

Have you tried that site?  You might find your soulmate.  There are alot of success stories that come from that place



Nope,never did,never will,I'll look for women the old fashioned way,clubs and bars or outside the virtual world.

You kept his number 2 and threw it in his face?  ;D  (okay...I know that's not what you meant)...


LOL! I knew taht is what that sounded like and I was gonna add to it but....  I SHOULD have thrown the actual feces in his face, storage was an issue.

Nope,never did,never will,I'll look for women the old fashioned way,clubs and bars or outside the virtual world.


So, just acting as Devil's Advocate, Have you gone to a club or bar to meet someone?  While it used to be a good place to meet somebody, I generally see meeting someone in a bar as a fling (even though sometimes it does happen that something more permanent comes from meeting someone while one or both parties are drinking...  :-\\ )

Can I ask why you aren't interested in meeting anyone online when you seem to spend alot of time on the internet?  I'd think you'd be more comfortable meeting/talking to someone that way at first.

Nope,never did,never will,I'll look for women the old fashioned way,clubs and bars or outside the virtual world.



You will never find your soulmate in clubs & bars. Some good places to meet women that are WORTH dating would be at your place of worship, the Y/fitness center, & the library to name a few.



Cat

Can I ask why you aren't interested in meeting anyone online when you seem to spend alot of time on the internet?  I'd think you'd be more comfortable meeting/talking to someone that way at first.


I don't know,I was never that kind of person who talks to people online even though I spend a lot of time on the internet which I do,maybe one day I'll look into it.

You will never find your soulmate in clubs & bars. Some good places to meet women that are WORTH dating would be at your place of worship, the Y/fitness center, & the library to name a few.



Cat



or Pathmark to name some places?  ;)

So, just acting as Devil's Advocate, Have you gone to a club or bar to meet someone?

No,never did I always wanted someone like one of my guy friends to go with,I just don't like going by myself.  :(

and my first thought was, if i was in the guy's situation, i would be like, 'aw, that's so sweet! i made her so nervous she threw up, because she likes me!' but it turns out throwing up on a first date is actually a big no-no.


"Was that wrong?  Should I not have done that?"

Obligatory funny story:

(And since this is already a poop thread...)

~set the DeLorean for the '90s and hits 88~

We're back at her place after dinner-and-a-movie, and she has to use the toilet.  And she clogs it.  Her own toilet.

Being a man, I don't see this as an "Time to be sympathetic and pretend to ignore the problem so as to save her the embarassment, even if it means I have to hold my bladder the rest of the night or make an excuse to go to the 7-11 to pick something up and take a leak in the alley..."

Being a man, I see this as I see everything, namely a problem to be fixed.  "No problem, I'll fix it, where's your plunger?  You... don't own a plunger?  OK, you're a toilet snake person.  Oh, a toilet snake is a... look, whaddya got in under the kitchen sink that we could use as a toilet snake?  Even a length of good solid garden hose would probably do it, just don't expect to use it again..."

We eventually broke up for completely unrelated reasons, we're still friends, but looking back, she must have been freaking mortified.  (Didn't own a plunger?  What, this is the first time in living history she's clogged it?  Of course she owns a plunger, she just didn't dare have it anywhere accessible, and doubly didn't want to admit to having to use it...)  But at the time, I was completely oblivious.  It was just a problem that needed to be fixed.  There's a reason I'm still a bachelor...

I'll never take back a girl who always threw job applications in my face,nervous about life,sometimes took situations much too seriously,always wanted to think about work,money and not having much fun.

i'm unnaturally curious as to whether she won her man back. i keep looking for more stories on it but this story is getting precious little coverage, for some reason. no one even lists her name. i want to send her a postcard wishing her luck. i really like to think i live in a world where gambits like this work, the way they do in wacky rom-coms. but alas, she'll probably just end up with a 10,000 euro fine, a felony charge, and a restraining order from her ex-beau.


I would so NOT take her back.  This actually kinda pisses me off.  I mean...what a freaking psycho.  Sometimes relationships just don't work out.  Staging your own kidnapping is just weird and creepy. 

Maybe I'm just in a bad mood. 

I had an ex that took me emotionally hostage for years.  I tried to break it off with him SO MANY times.  And he would always threaten to kill himself if I left.  Or he'd say if I left him he'd be homeless and his life would be destroyed.  And then he'd kill himself.  He put so much guilt on me and made me feel so responsible for him.  After a while I became so damn resentful.  After several years of this, I finally left, and he's alive and well today.  I just have a really hard time with people who put other people in situations like this.  It sucks being on the other side of it.

You will never find your soulmate in clubs & bars.

Hey, I met my first wife in a bar.  Oh wait...

1. Shouldn't this be in the TTT board?

2. Not sure I totally understand (tia is hard to gauge)... but is this about first date/initial meeting blunders, and asking if you went out with someone who did something like that, would you give them another shot and go out with them again? Or is it about the kind of mistakes someone can maike and how much would you put up with before saying enough is enough?



If it's the first one - I definitely would. :) I think lots of people get nervous especially if they don't know someone that well yet and wanna make a good first impression. I was unbelievably shy with girls especially as a kid and up as late as 2 years ago, so I totally understand how it feels on the other side to say or do something silly unintentionally.

If it's the second one - that depends on the situation. I'm usually very forgiving and understanding of people, so I think unless it was (1) a repeated thing that probably wouldn't stop and was hurtful to me or someone I cared about, or (2) something really serious, I probably would. But I'd be cautious too.

Nope,never did,never will,I'll look for women the old fashioned way,clubs and bars or outside the virtual world.


Going to clubs and bars is the wrong way to meet women.  You go to a club, start talking to a girl before you realize it,  she has a boyfriend already and he's standing right behind you waiting to bash your skull in for hitting on his girl

Going to clubs and bars is the wrong way to meet women.  You go to a club, start talking to a girl before you realize it,  she has a boyfriend already and he's standing right behind you waiting to bash your skull in for hitting on his girl


Never had that problem (I was a little too astute for that!), but I had terrible problems in listening and speaking to girls over the din in a club or such (my voice doesn't carry too well and my hearing's a little 'suspect'!)

Probably gives you some idea of the kind of clubs I went to... :P

Going to clubs and bars is the wrong way to meet women.  You go to a club, start talking to a girl before you realize it,  she has a boyfriend already and he's standing right behind you waiting to bash your skull in for hitting on his girl



You've been watching too much TV. ;D

1. Shouldn't this be in the TTT board?

2. Not sure I totally understand (tia is hard to gauge)... but is this about first date/initial meeting blunders, and asking if you went out with someone who did something like that, would you give them another shot and go out with them again? Or is it about the kind of mistakes someone can maike and how much would you put up with before saying enough is enough?



If it's the first one - I definitely would. :) I think lots of people get nervous especially if they don't know someone that well yet and wanna make a good first impression. I was unbelievably shy with girls especially as a kid and up as late as 2 years ago, so I totally understand how it feels on the other side to say or do something silly unintentionally.

If it's the second one - that depends on the situation. I'm usually very forgiving and understanding of people, so I think unless it was (1) a repeated thing that probably wouldn't stop and was hurtful to me or someone I cared about, or (2) something really serious, I probably would. But I'd be cautious too.


The second one, definitely not.