Sorry to start two threads so close together, but I have alot going through my mind now.

Long story short as possible, I feel like alot of goals and priorities in life have started changing, and that makes things confusing enough on its own. Like, up until recently, alot of the things I wanted to do in life were more for "me", now not so much. I've almost put my own plans on the backburner (i.e. wanting to pursue more acting and performing, even maybe going to next year's American Idol audition). Some people I've talked to about this more than others, but I guess what I'm trying to say is, has anyone else ever been torn by their own life versus someone else's? To where they even thought about moving a long distance from their home. What's the right thing to do, because logically that's obviously a huge step that takes alot of planning and you can't take it lightly? Yet if you feel so strong about it, you can't just turn the feelings off and ignore them.

What makes this confusing is that as they were, I was torn enough as it was. There's so much I want to do in life and it's a matter of narrowing it all down.

Believe me, you and I both know that I can definitely relate. I have never felt more torn in my life, as I do right now. The only thing I can tell you is to follow your heart (no matter what the decision may be). You heart seems to have a way of guiding you where you need to be (whether it is something that you want or don't want). If you are passionate about something, then never give up on it. If you have goals in life...don't let them go on the backburner, and don't let anyone else's problems/situations interfere with the things you've always dreamed of...that's not a fair thing to do to yourself.

I know, but it's like when you love someone so much, it's hard not to. So if I do my next standup in 2011 as opposed to '08, no huge deal. ;) I just don't want to work lousy retail jobs for the next three years either.

I think these are normal feelings to have, being torn, confused, not sure what door to open. I think I've felt like I wish that there was more adventure in my life, some risk, doing something meaningful. I'm thinking more of myself though. What I've found is a lot of the times I felt those pangs for something more, it's mostly emotional, and those feelings eventually subside and pass and I'm content with where I am. Those feelings did come and go a few times, mostly in my 30's and early 40's.

Did I misunderstand the intentions of this thread or what  ;D  Is ths a love thread?

Did I misunderstand the intentions of this thread or what  ;D  Is ths a love thread?


It's all good man, I'll just say it's ambiguous. ;) I get what you're saying in the other reply too. It's just that I have so many dreams and confusion over which one to actually go after. I'm the opposite of people with no ambition, because I have too much and it's all scattered!

It's all good man, I'll just say it's ambiguous. ;) I get what you're saying in the other reply too. It's just that I have so many dreams and confusion over which one to actually go after. I'm the opposite of people with no ambition, because I have too much and it's all scattered!
I hear ya too Jess. and for what it's worth, don't rush things or be hasty. There's a fine line sometimes between what we want and what we need. Look at the big picture and be patient and enjoy whatcha got.

I know, but it's like when you love someone so much, it's hard not to. So if I do my next standup in 2011 as opposed to '08, no huge deal. ;) I just don't want to work lousy retail jobs for the next three years either.
Yeah I understand what you are saying about you not wanting too work retail jobs the next 3 years of your life. I have been working as a security guard for about a little over 9 years now and I;m getting to the point where I don;t want to do it for another 3 years. I really want to something else like go to cosmotology school now. I thought about acting and I really wanted to do it for a long time but now I donlt want to do acting as much as I used too.

Yeah I understand what you are saying about you not wanting too work retail jobs the next 3 years of your life. I have been working as a security guard for about a little over 9 years now and I;m getting to the point where I don;t want to do it for another 3 years. I really want to something else like go to cosmotology school now. I thought about acting and I really wanted to do it for a long time but now I donlt want to do acting as much as I used too.

Yeah I understand what you're saying man. I didn't know you were a security guard, but I know people who have done that before, and it can get pretty tedious at times from what I've heard. What kind of acting did you want to do, like stage or television stuff (I've done a little of both)?

Cripes!  I'm usually torn with what I want to do in the next hour!
http://www.inthe00s.com/smile/13/icon_scratch.gif

But that's just the kind of neurotic I am.

Just about everybody I know has been torn with what they want to do in life. 

I know only a few who haven't, and they're either very serene or very smug!

I'm with Bf-f, such feelings are just part of life in a society where you're fortunate enough to have choices.  They're uncomfortable, but not unhealthy.
8)

I never was torn with what I wanted to do with my life because I never knew what I wanted to do.  When I exited college, all I wanted was a paying job in an office, that allowed me to live, and still get the little things in life that I enjoy.  I now have those things, so in a nutshell, i'm on my way to becoming set for the future

Daily.

For instance, right now I'm working a job I enjoy and I make good money doing it. It's a fun job and it gives me plenty of opportunities to do other things I enjoy. For instance, I get to go to pretty much every cool concert in town.. for free! It's great!
At the same time, I'm slowly chugging along towards my degree in a fairly specific field which there is high demand for right now.

So.. I can do the job I enjoy.. but also know that there's almost no room for progression (although I could care out a nice existence on what I make).. or.. go ahead and get all the educationy stuff out of the way and go ahead and make a s**t load of money.. but.. not particularly care about what I'm doing.

It's a difficult decision.

"Has anyone ever been torn with what they wanted to do in life?"

Yep! I've had at least a dozen different job interests in as many years. As much as I like what I'm doing now, I would say it's highly unlikely I will be doing it in three years. As soon as I get bored with something (which averages ~2 years for most everything), I pretty much lose all interest and find something different to do.

The difference now is I can realize what is realistic vs what is possible.

I've figured out a whole lot of what I don't want to do in life. I've also figured out that doing a little bit of everything in life is what I want, or at least what I gravitate toward.

Ant

You have to look at things realistically not as you would like them to be. For example, you want to go to Hollywood and go into movies. Yeah, that sounds great but realistically, it doesn't always work that way. You have audition and 9 times out of 10 you don't get the job. So, what do you do? Wait tables? Park cars? You need $$$ to get a place to live/eat, etc. And the cost of living in L.A. is outrageous.  Ok. That is just one scenario. But, you really have to listen to gut. There have been a couple of times in my life when my head & heart were telling two different things. One time it was my head that was screaming the loudest. That is when I listened to it. Another time it was my heart that was screaming. Again, I listened to it. One time I have learned over the years, is don't let anyone make major decisions for you. Only YOU know what will make you happy. If you allow someone else to make those decisions for you, you will be very unhappy. Listen to everyone's advice but trust your inner voice to make the final decision.



Cat

it took me more than 40 years to get to where I was sure that I was sunsure.

:)

Yes.  I think mine is "I'm not happy with what I'm doing in life . . . do I have a plan B"?  Who would have thought at 35 years old I'm still trying to decide whether I should just pull up stake and start fresh somewhere else.

Yeah I understand what you're saying man. I didn't know you were a security guard, but I know people who have done that before, and it can get pretty tedious at times from what I've heard. What kind of acting did you want to do, like stage or television stuff (I've done a little of both)?
Yeah being a guard does get boring and I don;t look foward to going to work sometimes but what can you do? Anyways, television stuff I would/did want to do in terms of acting.

I just took a big step and gave up a low-paying but great job to return to what I used to do which is less fun but mroe rewarding and lots more money.
It's OK. I think I'll like it in the end. 
Id still rather do nothing.

Im still undecided.  Undecided people can rest.  There are no time limits so don't worry.