I know a few people have mentioned this in passing on other threads, so I just wondered what everyone else's experiences or opinions were.

As I've said before on here, I usually got along with adults/teens better than with other kids in my childhood. Despite that I'm outgoing, I always tended to be better at conversation and one on one interaction as opposed to, say in a group or "party" atmosphere. My love of analyzing stuff has been around forever too, lol - I guess that's a part of discussion.

I went to private schools all through Elementary, with less kids and more teacher attention. I'm not sure if this environment made me this way, or if it was already ingrained in me and this merely helped.

I've always been the type that has been better around people that are older than me too. Infact, most of our friends are our parent's friends (anywhere from age 40 and up).

I've always been the type that has been better around people that are older than me too. Infact, most of our friends are our parent's friends (anywhere from age 40 and up).


That's interesting, has it stayed the same for you over the years? With me, I've now gotten to the point of being pretty good at all three age groups (older, peerlike and younger), although there's times I still feel more comfortable with older people - less pressure on me to be cool, etc.

My perceptions have plateaued in comparison to past years, though. When I was 16, 10 year olds were like little kids to me. Nowadays I barely notice a difference interacting with a 19-year old (even if I grew up with some different stuff than they did), and the more mature 16 and 17-year olds I can pretty much view as peerlike too. On the older side, anyone up to 35 or so I can view in the same league with me too.

With me, I've now gotten to the point of being pretty good at all three age groups (older, peerlike and younger), although there's times I still feel more comfortable with older people - less pressure on me to be cool, etc.


Yeah it's the same with me.  And I especially understand the...being more comfortable with older people thing.  A few weeks ago, my brother (he's 22) and I played music at a nursing home.  Afterwards, we hung out with some of the 90-year-old ladies there, lol.  We thought it was refreshing talking to old people again, it seems like they don't really judge you.  Also, since there's such a huge age-gap between us and the old people, they don't really expect you to like...have your whole life mapped out already.  They still look at you like "little kids", instead of adults, which is fine by me, lol.  ;D

Yeah it's the same with me.  And I especially understand the...being more comfortable with older people thing.  A few weeks ago, my brother (he's 22) and I played music at a nursing home.  Afterwards, we hung out with some of the 90-year-old ladies there, lol.  We thought it was refreshing talking to old people again, it seems like they don't really judge you.  Also, since there's such a huge age-gap between us and the old people, they don't really expect you to like...have your whole life mapped out already.  They still look at you like "little kids", instead of adults, which is fine by me, lol.  ;D


That's cool, did you guys actually perform (i.e. with instruments and all) onstage?

I actually did that once before too at an old folks home (I told them jokes, lol and it went over pretty well). I've found that senior citizens can be really nice most of the time. They've got interesting stories to tell too, so I always liked hearing what they've got to say about growing up and all. And I know they're not going to be around forever either - someone born in 1920 is already almost 90. When they die, it's like a part of the past does too, which is sad.

No, I can't say that I have.  I didn't have a ton of friends as a kid, but the ones I did have were my age.  And when I was in high school, I was friendly with the teachers and whatnot, but they weren't "friends".  In fact, all my friends are within 1-2 years of me age-wise. 

I do pretty well in both a one-on-one environment and a party atmosphere, although I'm hardly the drunk girl dancing on the table topless.  I can hold my own in a group of people, and I tend to hang in a group of people who are discussing issues that I'm fond of or that I can chime in on.

That's cool, did you guys actually perform (i.e. with instruments and all) onstage?

I actually did that once before too at an old folks home (I told them jokes, lol and it went over pretty well). I've found that senior citizens can be really nice most of the time. They've got interesting stories to tell too, so I always liked hearing what they've got to say about growing up and all. And I know they're not going to be around forever either - someone born in 1920 is already almost 90. When they die, it's like a part of the past does too, which is sad.


oh gosh, I love hearing old people's stories about their past/growing up years....it makes me yearn to have lived back then.

No, I can't say that I have.  I didn't have a ton of friends as a kid, but the ones I did have were my age.  And when I was in high school, I was friendly with the teachers and whatnot, but they weren't "friends".  In fact, all my friends are within 1-2 years of me age-wise. 

I do pretty well in both a one-on-one environment and a party atmosphere, although I'm hardly the drunk girl dancing on the table topless.  I can hold my own in a group of people, and I tend to hang in a group of people who are discussing issues that I'm fond of or that I can chime in on.


Maybe I'm coming on it from the point of that I changed schools and towns quite a bit (although it was all in the same general area, everywhere I've lived is within say 100 miles). I was often the proverbial "new guy" at school, in the neighborhood and anywhere else I went. I'm more adapt at dealing with this now, but I used to kinda not like being by myself among a crowd. Let's say walking into a classroom or hallway where there were a bunch of different cliques hanging around with each other. That can make trying to interact feel awkward, like Ummm okay, where do I go from here?

I can see what you mean about having some common thing to discuss, I'm that way too. As long as I had something to say, I was never too shy (it was just a matter of getting there, lol).

I do it too! I'm not big on socializing but in university i would converse more with the mature returning to school students rather than hear the daily ---& people my own age were bound to talk about.  Not that i avoided everyone, because one must do group projects now and again, but generally I think I do prefer people at my age or older rather than younger.  Even when I was small i did play group games with all the neighborhood children but for small games or dolls and such I chose the slightly older ones and the ones my age rather than the younger ones.  I've never had more than 2 friends at a time.  Even now, I don't have anyone close by to talk to; My "friends" are all long-distances away.  :-\\  Being the first born I think I missed something in the get out there and be social side of things.  I always seemed to be acquainted with people who seemed to conveniently leave me alone when anything was happening in 2ndary school, so by the time people were considering if I'd be fun at a party, the invitations would already be passed out and I'd get a "maybe next time". But where does that leave me now??? Socially lacking in the get out there and meet people way of doing things. :\'(

A mix. I have some friends my age and some friends who are older. It's really a mix. I really don't think about age when I'm choosing my friends, it just depends on who I can connect with. I don't find that goes along age lines as much as just the way I interact.

I do better in smaller groups than larger groups but I will make some appearances at larger group functions, because I'd rather be thought of as a quieter member of the group than not be thought of as part of the group at all. It's good to have connections.

A mix. I have some friends my age and some friends who are older. It's really a mix. I really don't think about age when I'm choosing my friends, it just depends on who I can connect with. I don't find that goes along age lines as much as just the way I interact.

I do better in smaller groups than larger groups but I will make some appearances at larger group functions, because I'd rather be thought of as a quieter member of the group than not be thought of as part of the group at all. It's good to have connections.

Good points all around.

I agree about connecting with someone more on common interests or getting along with them as opposed to how old they are. There are people who cast judgement on others without getting to know them, just based on something arbitrary like that which they can't help. That's stupid.

On a slightly different note when I was little, between the ages of 3 - 11, apart from school there were no girls my age living around us only boys. I grew up playing with them and due to that I think always got on better with guys than girls. It's pretty much evened out now and I have a group of friends ranging from their 50's to their 20's.

My 3 absolute closest friends are 2 girls and a gay guy.  I've always gotten along better with gay guys than straight ones.  I wonder why that is....

On a slightly different note when I was little, between the ages of 3 - 11, apart from school there were no girls my age living around us only boys. I grew up playing with them and due to that I think always got on better with guys than girls.
Same here.  Now, there aren't many "women" my age around here.  Most of my sons' friends' moms are either older than me by 10 years....even my youngest's :o

I'd say I get on with a range of people.  Up to the first three years at secondary school I mainly hung out with girls the same age as me, from class and that.  After the age of 14 I had a whole range of friends.  Now I would say my two closest friends are two blokes.  One is about 4 years older than me and the other is about 8 years older than me.  I used to work with them and we get together a few times a month.

Once I know a group of people I've generally found it easy to get along with anyone in the group.  Sure, there are sometimes people I don't like but if they are work colleagues for example I can usually tolerate them.  My role at work means working with students, experimental participants and staff in a range of senior roles within the university.  Whilst a majority of these are not friends I still need to be able to converse easily with them.

Just another thing to pose: I wonder if this feeling is more common among those who were an only child? I was, and I've heard this from other people that didn't have any siblings. I guess 'cause it sorta "forces" you to look elsewhere for friends moreso than if you had a brother or sister, especially one close in age to you.

Although it could be based on the individual personality of the kid too. Personally I liked finding out stuff about various things, which is why talking with adults/people older than me seemed more stimulating and interesting than other little kids when I was one. Not that I didn't have some friends my own age too, I did, but I'm talking in general.

I've always been a bit of a "loner".....still am to this day.  I only have 1 person who I feel comfortable calling up and just "chatting."  Even on here, I only have a few people that I "talk" to and it seems lately, I haven't even been able to do that because I only get on here for a few minutes at a time :(

I tend to get along well with guys 10-15 years older than I am,That's how I see it.

When I was a kid I got a long better with adults than kids my own age. 

That's cool, did you guys actually perform (i.e. with instruments and all) onstage?


Yeah, I play songs on violin and my bro plays the chords on guitar that go along with them.  ;D  


Just another thing to pose: I wonder if this feeling is more common among those who were an only child? I was, and I've heard this from other people that didn't have any siblings. I guess 'cause it sorta "forces" you to look elsewhere for friends moreso than if you had a brother or sister, especially one close in age to you.


It could be.  I have brothers, but no sisters....which did make me feel more like the "loner" in some ways at times.  Was probably why my mom had me join Girl Scouts when I was younger.  I don't know.  But I was also the youngest of my family, in that way I found that it was a lot easier talking to older people, quite easy with my peers, but still sort of hard with little kids.

I guess when people get older they tend to hang out with guys or girls a little bit much higher in age than they are.

I have generally hung out with more people who were older than I was (and a few who were my age). I finally realized why. I am the tail end of the baby boomers and most people in my generation are older-so in that context, I have more in common with people who are older than I am. However, in the last several years, I have discovered that some of my women friends tend to be a bit younger. I do have a very close and special friendship with someone who is much younger than I-a 21 year old-my step-daughter.


Cat

I have generally hung out with more people who were older than I was (and a few who were my age). I finally realized why. I am the tail end of the baby boomers and most people in my generation are older-so in that context, I have more in common with people who are older than I am. However, in the last several years, I have discovered that some of my women friends tend to be a bit younger. I do have a very close and special friendship with someone who is much younger than I-a 21 year old-my step-daughter.


Cat


I know I'm contradicting myself a little (since I'm one of the prime decadeology/generations/birthspan analysis types around here, lol), but I think that stuff is really subjective and gets pigeonholed WAY too much. It depends on the person.

The media may term Boomers to be born from 1945/'46 through 1963/'64, but does it really mean someone born in 1963 has more in common with someone almost 20 years older than someone 3 years younger? That doesn't make much sense. I do get what you're saying though. ;)

I know I'm contradicting myself a little (since I'm one of the prime decadeology/generations/birthspan analysis types around here, lol), but I think that stuff is really subjective and gets pigeonholed WAY too much. It depends on the person.

The media may term Boomers to be born from 1945/'46 through 1963/'64, but does it really mean someone born in 1963 has more in common with someone almost 20 years older than someone 3 years younger? That doesn't make much sense. I do get what you're saying though. ;)



I do agree. I have known people my age who get along with more people who are younger than they are. I just find for myself that I have always gotten along with more older people. The strange thing is that Carlos is at the beginning of the baby boomers and I'm at the end and I think we have one of the best marriages than just about anyone we know.



Cat

I do agree. I have known people my age who get along with more people who are younger than they are. I just find for myself that I have always gotten along with more older people. The strange thing is that Carlos is at the beginning of the baby boomers and I'm at the end and I think we have one of the best marriages than just about anyone we know.



Cat


Yeah, from the bits I've seen, he seems like a really nice guy. I think true happiness is more about connecting with someone, not how long they've been on this Earth.

I guess I just said that because it seems like most people don't like being lumped in with people who are older/not as cool as them. But if you've always gotten along with older people, that would make sense. I think I'll always have a kinship with people 5-20 years older than me as well.