Can a guy have a girl as a friend and keep it as a friendship? I say no, even though
you have friends of the opposite sex, the guys will always wonder what it would be
like to take the friendship to the next level. It may never work out, but I doubt a
guy would turn down the opportunity to have friendship sex.

any thoughts?

I have a ton of guy friends that I have no interest in sexually, either because they're gay or because they are already in committed relationships.  So, it works for me.

If they're fat and covered in pimples!

Lol, just kidding

I have a ton of guy friends that I have no interest in sexually, either because they're gay or because they are already in committed relationships.  So, it works for me.


But do your guy friends feel the same, regardless of their relationship status?

I think it is easier for a girl to be just friends with a guy. The guy always has sex
on the mind, and often does things without thinking.

Once a woman uses the F-word on you, all is lost unless you;re gay.

Can a guy have a girl as a friend and keep it as a friendship? I say no, even though
you have friends of the opposite sex, the guys will always wonder what it would be
like to take the friendship to the next level. It may never work out, but I doubt a
guy would turn down the opportunity to have friendship sex.

any thoughts?


I guess it depends on the person as well. It's a misconception that guys find almost every female they see desirable material - like there are plenty of girls I wouldn't have much interest going in the sack with. I'd much rather have a meaningful conversation with them, or talk about feelings while eating cookies and milk.  :D

I have friends who are girls and who have no interest in taking things a step further. Only 2 of them are in relationships. Likewise, they have lads who are just friends and aren't interested... it dun't mean they're gay, though  ???

Hmmm.... well, there was that quote from the whole "When Harry Met Sally" thing.. I think if you have sexual interest in a girl it makes things a little weirder, but the friendship can still exist. The only thing I could think is if there's an interest on BOTH sides.. that would be weird. Or after an actual relationship has taken place. But other then that, I can't see why a full, if not occasionally awkward, friendship couldn't exist.

But do your guy friends feel the same, regardless of their relationship status?

I think it is easier for a girl to be just friends with a guy. The guy always has sex
on the mind, and often does things without thinking.



I would assume they do because even before a couple of them met their current girlfriends, they never hit on me or tried to get anywhere with me.  I think it's wrong to say that a guy always has sex on the mind; I'm sure a great majority of guys think about getting laid 24/7, but I don't think all men ALWAYS are thinking about getting some. 

I would assume they do because even before a couple of them met their current girlfriends, they never hit on me or tried to get anywhere with me.  I think it's wrong to say that a guy always has sex on the mind; I'm sure a great majority of guys think about getting laid 24/7, but I don't think all men ALWAYS are thinking about getting some. 


You're so wrong. :P

What I am really getting at, is the thought there? You don't have to act out on a thought.
I have a very good friend, Nikki, who I adore. She tells me things she wouldn't tell her best
girlfriend or her fiance, that's how close we are. Now, I wouldn't do anything to hurt my
marriage or her relationship, nor would I hurt our friendship. Believe me, in the twenty years
we've been friends, the thought has crossed my mind once or twice.

What I am really getting at, is the thought there? You don't have to act out on a thought.
I have a very good friend, Nikki, who I adore. She tells me things she wouldn't tell her best
girlfriend or her fiance, that's how close we are. Now, I wouldn't do anything to hurt my
marriage or her relationship, nor would I hurt our friendship. Believe me, in the twenty years
we've been friends, the thought has crossed my mind once or twice.


You wouldn't be human if the thought hadn't crossed your mind. However, your love for your wife quenches any form of desire for Nikki I'm sure.

The crux is this. A man and a woman can be friends if there is no attraction on both sides or one respects the others marital status. I have plenty of girl-friends and, yes the thought has entered my mind on more than one occassion but that is where reasoning and self-control come into play.

As for men, men think about sex an awful lot consciously or subconsciously. It is a primal instinct and I'll tell you now, if we had no religion conditioning us or politics controlling how we act - it would be a free-for-all.  ;D

I think men and women can be friends, but yes, even women can be guilty of maybe having the thought cross their mind once or twice. I agree with you, Bobby.

I think they can.  I have a few guy friends that are just friends. 

I think men and women can be friends, but yes, even women can be guilty of maybe having the thought cross their mind once or twice. I agree with you, Bobby.


I got the impression that women seem to have more of a handle over their desires than men. We men burst a bloodvessel to control any sexual thoughts that enter into our minds.

I got the impression that women seem to have more of a handle over their desires than men. We men burst a bloodvessel to control any sexual thoughts that enter into our minds.


I've had the thought once or twice with some friends. It doesn't mean I want to do anything, it's just my mind escaping from me for a moment.  ;D

I've had the thought once or twice with some friends. It doesn't mean I want to do anything, it's just my mind escaping from me for a moment.  ;D


I think a lot of men are the same.

I think a lot of men are the same.


I agree  ;)

I have had a lot of male friends over the years. There may have been a few that I have thought about taking the friendship one step further-but as the saying goes, "sex ruins a friendship." I can't speak for the guys if they had those feelings or not.





Cat

the real question is, why don't girls put out more?

Not unless she's ugly.

Well.. seriously now..

To a certain degree there will always be underlying sexual frustration, but dang, I get sexually frustrated standing in line at Target, I think about nailing the chick three seats away at a baseball game, I'm currently pondering how fantastic it would be to root the new girls who moved in down the street.

It's a constant thought.

Yeah sure, you can be friends, but accept the fact that he probably (maybe even unknowingly) wants to nail you.

the real question is, why don't girls put out more?


;D ;D

That deserves applause!

the real question is, why don't girls put out more?


Cause they're gay, usually. I mean, what other logical explanation could there be?

the real question is, why don't girls put out more?


Oh we do 'put-out' it's just that we make you work for your reward.  LOL!!  :o

I think that there are a lot of women out there who could be friends with a guy and have no sexual thoughts, but I do not think a man can be friends with a woman and not have sexual thoughts, unless she was really unattractive.

When I was single I had male friends who never made a move on me, never showed any signs of interest and I found out later on that they really liked me as more than just a friend.  Also my husband has friends who are married and we all hang out as couples, we talk and have a great time and everything seems innocent.  Then when my husband and his friends go out to a bar together, they sit around telling each other how nice it would be to screw the other guys wife.  So it doesn't matter whether or not the guy is married or not making a move on you.  Chances are that he is still having the thoughts.

Yes they can.  I have many attractive female friends, very attractive and curvacious and never, ever do I think of a ravaging them in a lusty, hot, sweet, sticky, steamy, kinky, frothy all embracing love clench. I don't. We're just friends.

Yes they can.  I have many attractive female friends, very attractive and curvacious and never, ever do I think of a ravaging them in a lusty, hot, sweet, sticky, steamy, kinky, frothy all embracing love clench. I don't. We're just friends.


You kiss your wife with that mouth full of lies?  ;D

Gee Mike, why am I having a hard time believing that?  ;D



I should say that I do have a male friend (not on this board, so no one get any ideas) that I have occasionally thought about doing the dirty with.  I mean, I know that if I were to call him and say "Dude, get over here and do me" he'd be over in a heartbeat, but he is probably my best friend out of all my friends male or female, and losing his friendship would hurt the most. 

Hmmm.... well, there was that quote from the whole "When Harry Met Sally" thing..

"I'll have what she's having"?

I've never thought about sex with a male friend.

I have thought about how it would feel to passionately kiss someone, however I would never actually do it (might if I wasn't a married woman).

I don't think there is anthing wrong with having these thoughts, unless you spend every waking hour thinking about screwing your friend...then you might want to seek help.

You kiss your wife with that mouth full of lies?  ;D
she ain't got to know about this talk we're having Davey boy.  ::) but yeah, She gets and gives kisses sweeter than honey.  but a guy & girl can only control so much. I remember a friend, just a friend mind you, a good close friend going thru a tough time. We're at my place, after having a good comforting talk, and it's time for her to leave so we hug & something happened that wasn't planned. the smell of her perfume, her soft golden hair, eyes sparkling, bodies pressed close together and the friendship changed. So as much a we feel we have self control, sexual instinct is a very powerful force to keep under control once (arrroused say like dr. ruth and roll the r's)


Gee Mike, why am I having a hard time believing that?   ;D

I should say that I do have a male friend (not on this board, so no one get any ideas) that I have occasionally thought about doing the dirty with.  I mean, I know that if I were to call him and say "Dude, get over here and do me" he'd be over in a heartbeat, but he is probably my best friend out of all my friends male or female, and losing his friendship would hurt the most. 
because you know I'm full of crap  ;D  ;D         go ahead and bang the friend, maybe you two can be the first to have that and manage to keep the friendship like Jerry & Elaine tried to do in Seinfeld episode.  but seriously you can't have both  8)

My oldest closest freind was a guy.  We met in high school and became fast freinds, but I think part of the
dynamic was that he didn't have any sisters, and I always wanted a younger brother(he was 3 years younger).
We were kinda misfits, liked the same things, and just ended up hanging out.  We both also had best friends of
our same sex, so when it came to going out and meeting people we were never in each others way.  We truly were like brother and sister, but I have never seen another relationship like it among my circle of friends, and a lot of people didn't understand it and made assumptions that weren't true, but we really didn't care. It lasted 30 years, until he died. 

You kiss your wife with that mouth full of lies?  ;D


Lol. Nice one, Andy! We've been there and thought it all ourselves.  ;D

because you know I'm full of crap  ;D  ;D        go ahead and bang the friend, maybe you two can be the first to have that and manage to keep the friendship like Jerry & Elaine tried to do in Seinfeld episode.  but seriously you can't have both  8)



If my friendship with him meant less to me than what it does, I might.  But the both of us have been through a lot together and during a couple rough patches for us both, all we had was each other to turn to.  As great as the sex would be, in the long run......no way in hell would it be worth it.

Lol. Nice one, Andy! We've been there and thought it all ourselves.  ;D


Exactly.

Only time I wouldn't try it is if she were seeing a friend.

No woman is worth the loss of your pals.

Exactly.

Only time I wouldn't try it is if she were seeing a friend.

No woman is worth the loss of your pals.


I totally agree. You have your mates all your life but sex can take . . . well . . . as little or as long as you like, lol.

I totally agree. You have your mates all your life but sex can take . . . well . . . as little or as long as you like, lol.


;D
Well, I'll tread around this one carefully.

If for instance, I was going out with someone who couldn't stand my friends, well.. then we run in to some problems.

I mean.. some of them, OK, if you're really keen on her, you can make sacrifices, but obviously, if she just hates them all then it's a case of 'Say Goodbye'.

Yes they can.  I have many attractive female friends, very attractive and curvacious and never, ever do I think of a ravaging them in a lusty, hot, sweet, sticky, steamy, kinky, frothy all embracing love clench. I don't. We're just friends.


Frothy? Christ, is Root Beer involved?

That "Love Clench" sounds like the most disgusting combination of flavors on Earth.. it's like a hot pocket covered in hot fudge and covered in dish soap.

;D
Well, I'll tread around this one carefully.

If for instance, I was going out with someone who couldn't stand my friends, well.. then we run in to some problems.

I mean.. some of them, OK, if you're really keen on her, you can make sacrifices, but obviously, if she just hates them all then it's a case of 'Say Goodbye'.


A certain amount of compromise is healthy in a relationship but if a woman flat out hates every single person I am friends with for the sheer sake of it then I too would probably do the same thing. I know from personal experience that devoting your entire life to your girlfriend's attention is just a headache waiting to happen.

A certain amount of compromise is healthy in a relationship but if a woman flat out hates every single person I am friends with for the sheer sake of it then I too would probably do the same thing. I know from personal experience that devoting your entire life to your girlfriend's attention is just a headache waiting to happen.


Treat her like a Princess, as long as she treats you moderatly better than the dog.  ;D

Treat her like a Princess, as long as she treats you moderatly better than the dog.  ;D


Heh heh, 'aint that the way.

My ex treated me much better than a dog in most ways.

My ex treated me much better than a dog in most ways.


She kept your bowl inside then, I take it?

She kept your bowl inside then, I take it?


Lol.

My leash was a little longer than most of the other blokes.  ;)

Heh heh, 'aint that the way.

My ex treated me much better than a dog in most ways.


You were allowed on the furniture eh.

Nah, you know what I mean.

It's a two way street.
One can't be expected to be the pinnacle of gentlemanly behavior when one's other half is a cun.t!

You were allowed on the furniture eh.

Nah, you know what I mean.

It's a two way street.
One can't be expected to be the pinnacle of gentlemanly behavior when one's other half is a cun.t!


Very true, very true - there is only so much a person can deal with.

Very true, very true - there is only so much a person can deal with.

Of course.

(I continued our other debate on 'The Longest thread conceivable'

Of course.

(I continued our other debate on 'The Longest thread conceivable'


Alright then. I'll chase it up.

Frothy? Christ, is Root Beer involved?

That "Love Clench" sounds like the most disgusting combination of flavors on Earth.. it's like a hot pocket covered in hot fudge and covered in dish soap.
frothy, foamy like a root beer float.  sorry to ruin your appetite, I was just gettin carried away being goofy    :D

Reading through all your post has been quite entertaining.Everyone has pretty much answered
the question. Opposite sex friendships are possible but a sexual feelings do arise, amongst other
things.It seems women can keep a friendship strictly platonic, after all, it is the women who control
the sex. The men, however, have trouble keeping a platonic relationship, even if it is just a fantasy.

Dad, you should know that guys can have friends that are girls, I have lots of them.

Well, yeah!

Last year, almost all of my friends were girls.

I guess a friendship with the opposite sex can easily turn into a "When Harry Met Sally" sort of deal. Yet, they worked out okay in the end - but geez, it was SO obvious they needed to have sex and get it over with. They SO wanted each other for too long..
;D

Yes, guys and girls can be JUST friends...but most of the time there is some sort of sexual tension or at least flirting involved....you just have to know not to act upon it.

do you think people on the bord flirt with others on the boards?

do you think people on the bord flirt with others on the boards?



is the sky blue and the grass green? LOL!  I would say, heck ya! ;) ;D :D

is the sky blue and the grass green? LOL!  I would say, heck ya! ;) ;D :D



well right now the sky is dark and I think cloudy.. but yes the grass is green.
have you your self flirted with any one on the boards?

well right now the sky is dark and I think cloudy.. but yes the grass is green.
have you your self flirted with any one on the boards?




yes...I mean, nothing serious (to where I would confuse them into thinking that I had feelings for them)....but innocent flirting...we've all done it. ;)

yes...I mean, nothing serious (to where I would confuse them into thinking that I had feelings for them)....but innocent flirting...we've all done it. ;)



i would have to say your true on that one.  i guess flirting is a way of life?

is the sky blue and the grass green? LOL!  I would say, heck ya! ;) ;D :D
;D  ;D  


I guess a friendship with the opposite sex can easily turn into a "When Harry Met Sally" sort of deal. Yet, they worked out okay in the end - but geez, it was SO obvious they needed to have sex and get it over with. They SO wanted each other for too long..
;D

my favorite scene is after they finally give in to sexual instinct, and they're lying in bed, she's all warm and snuggly, he's looking straight up at the ceiling expressionless, almost shocked in disbelief, classic Billy Crystal, but the point is I'm sure he's thinking they've taken the friendship into unchartered waters and he's questioning whether they should have.

do you think people on the bord flirt with others on the boards?



Mike and I flirt so much in some cultures we'd already be married.

i would have to say your true on that one.  i guess flirting is a way of life?



ya, I mean it can be okay...if it doesn't get out of hand (whenever you are in a committed relationship).

I have seen  "When Harry Met Sally" but the real inspiration behind this thread was taken
from an episode of NCIS.

Mike and I flirt so much in some cultures we'd already be married.
There must be something about the name Mike  ???

yes...I mean, nothing serious (to where I would confuse them into thinking that I had feelings for them)....but innocent flirting...we've all done it. ;)


It's ok.. you can tell them.

I have seen  "When Harry Met Sally" but the real inspiration behind this thread was taken
from an episode of NCIS.


Witch one? I watch all of them, Becuase i must see Abby.

It's ok.. you can tell them.




meh ::)

There must be something about the name Mike  ???



I know, tell me about. 

I know, tell me about. 
I don't flirt because of what mama used to tell me

I don't flirt because of what mama used to tell me



and what did mama say?

and what did mama say?


There'll be days like this?

and what did mama say?



Told me not to come?

and what did mama say?
little girls are the devil!!!!

little girls are the devil!!!!



The horns are there to hold up my halo.

good thread loki13, sparked a lot of insights and fun. one last comment before I go for awhile.
A little bit of flirting is ok as long as there's a lady involved  ;) 
http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c235/badfingermike/ladiesman.jpg

check out my post count. now who did that? I bet it was a lady  8)

c ya

good thread loki13, sparked a lot of insights and fun. one last comment before I go for awhile.
A little bit of flirting is ok as long as there's a lady involved  ;) 
http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c235/badfingermike/ladiesman.jpg

check out my post count. now who did that? I bet it was a lady  8)

c ya


It's a shame I have to wait 24 hours to award a karma point because this
one deserves it.

check out my post count. now who did that? I bet it was a lady  8)

c ya



You pig.  :P

It's a shame I have to wait 24 hours to award a karma point because this
one deserves it.


;D

I'll do it for you! :)

;D

I'll do it for you! :)


Thanks Chrissy, and here's one for you for the effort.

Thanks Chrissy, and here's one for you for the effort.


;D

Thanks, man! ;)

I finally got some time to read through this thread.  Very curious.  What can I add?  I have a few guy friends who I would not want to mess around with and the thought has never crossed my mind and I have no idea if they've had any ideas about me. 

Overall:  I think it's possible to just be friends, but rare.

It's a shame I have to wait 24 hours to award a karma point because this
one deserves it.
thanks Loki13, you're a good man & Tim's a son you gotta be proud of.  I take it you are a fan of the Ladies Man. I love that character and those sketcheson SNL, & I crack up every time I see em.
thanks for Karma, and you get some for starting a good thread.


;D

I'll do it for you! :)
thanks, you get some too  (Karma)


You pig.   :P
and some for you (Karma)  http://www.inthe00s.com/smile/07/oink.gif total pig I was, but not anymore :)


and what did mama say?
that little girls are the devil was from The Waterboy

I guess people who DON'T think it's possible to have have close friendships with other guys/girls haven't really had any such 'proper' friendships with the opposite sex, and hence may have developed that outlook on things. Like they may have had 'friends' who were only friends because they were interested in them as a potential partner, and hence not realise that you can just be friends with a girl/guy.

I have a few guy friends who I would not want to mess around with and the thought has never crossed my mind and I have no idea if they've had any ideas about me. 




I agree with this statement.  I go out a couple of times a month with two blokes I used to work with.  We have a great laugh over some beers and then go home to our own partners.

I agree with this statement.  I go out a couple of times a month with two blokes I used to work with.  We have a great laugh over some beers and then go home to our own partners.


Yep.  It's easier, perhaps, to have these friendships when you have a partner at home -- I think that makes a difference.  Also, perhaps, age.  It was easier at 14....not as easy at 20....not really an issue at 45 (for the most part).

And yes, as Trimac mentioned, our experiences would effect our view.

Yep.  It's easier, perhaps, to have these friendships when you have a partner at home -- I think that makes a difference.  Also, perhaps, age.  It was easier at 14....not as easy at 20....not really an issue at 45 (for the most part).

And yes, as Trimac mentioned, our experiences would effect our view.


You are so right about the age thing.  I didn't have much of a problem in my teens, but once I got into my twenties it became a lot more difficult.

You are so right about the age thing.  I didn't have much of a problem in my teens, but once I got into my twenties it became a lot more difficult.


I don't think I've ever found it a problem.  Maybe having older brothers has meant that I got used to have boys around all the time who patently didn't fancy me!

I got the impression that women seem to have more of a handle over their desires than men. We men burst a bloodvessel to control any sexual thoughts that enter into our minds.


Well, to be fair, i think society has always conditioned women to feel like they're a "slut" if they express their desires openly, even though a man is a "stud" if he does the same.  Its a double standard.

It is possible for guys and girls to be just friends, but in some cases, it is very very difficult

I don't think I've ever found it a problem.  Maybe having older brothers has meant that I got used to have boys around all the time who patently didn't fancy me!


Thats an interesting thought.

I don't have any sisters, nor any female cousins anywhere close to my age.  I didn't have female friends growing up either.. so maybe thats why bein' around girls makes me uncomfortable.

Perhaps thats part of why I favor older women too, now that I think of it.  I wasn't ever around girls my age.  All the females I was around growing up(not many anyway) were grown. 

Once a woman uses the F-word on you, all is lost unless you;re gay.


Huh?  ??? :-\\ :D :o

I don't think I've ever found it a problem.  Maybe having older brothers has meant that I got used to have boys around all the time who patently didn't fancy me!


You'd hope not... :D

Huh?  ??? :-\\ :D :o



F-word = friends

I guess to some people, the friendship comes AFTER the sex.  :D

It is possible for guys and girls to be just friends, but in some cases, it is very very difficult


I would have to agree on that one.

Yes, but girl friends are kind of different than guy friends.

Sometimes it's not that easy

I always thought so...but you never know what other people are thinking...they might LIKE you like you

I guess to some people, the friendship comes AFTER the sex.  :D


For some people the friendship doesn't arrive at all before or after sex.

F-word = friends


(Pats hand into open palm)

Oh, okay.

Exactly.

Only time I wouldn't try it is if she were seeing a friend.

No woman is worth the loss of your pals.

No sex is worth the loss of any friendship. 

Best friend I ever had is female.  She turned me down more than 10 years ago.  Smartest move she ever made.  Funny part is that I turned her down a couple years ago, and it's probably the smartest move I ever made. 

I hope she finds who she's looking for - it was only when she asked me out that I finally realized I was no longer it.

Everyone reading this thread:  Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to google the term "quirkyalone".  It's every bit as valid a lifestyle as being coupled.

one thing i dont under stand girls dont want to be in a realtionship but want to get with you and all
so they say lets be frinds with benifets. so u getwith them one week and next week some otherr girl
just to find out that u lost the first girl in a huge fight on how u meesed that the "friend" ment bf and gf



I have no idea what you just said.

For some people the friendship doesn't arrive at all before or after sex.


I guess the answer is, everything is possible.  There are few hard and fast rules except for what we decide and what our experience hands us.  

I have no idea what you just said.


ok last year, i was getting with this girl, she did not want to be boyfriend and girlfriend
so she was like let be friend with benifets( witch is we can hook up and so on but no be with each other)
so i was like ok, well i kissed her on day and like maybe 2 weeks later i kissed another girl, only to find out later
that the first girl was mad at me because she want to be with me but never told me so i screwd up every thing because girsl never no what they want. but all guys must no girls run the world

hope that explaned it better

ok last year, i was getting with this girl, she did not want to be boyfriend and girlfriend
so she was like let be friend with benifets( witch is we can hook up and so on but no be with each other)
so i was like ok, well i kissed her on day and like maybe 2 weeks later i kissed another girl, only to find out later
that the first girl was mad at me because she want to be with me but never told me so i screwd up every thing because girsl never no what they want. but all guys must no girls run the world

hope that explaned it better


I understood what you were saying the first time.  Chicks like that just want to have their cake and eat it too.  Those are the girls to stay away from, but of course I'm sure you know that now. ;)

I understood what you were saying the first time.  Chicks like that just want to have their cake and eat it too.  Those are the girls to stay away from, but of course I'm sure you know that now. ;)


Yep, good advice.  This girl wouldn't have made that great a friend in the long term -- she needs to learn a bit about herself, hm?  The whole "friends with benefits" thing isn't all it's cracked up to be.  Few people can really sustain that kind of 'friendship' and more often than not neither the friendship nor the intimacy grows very much.  Adding sex to the friendship changes the dynamics of the relationship and most people (imo) are not prepared for that change in feelings and don't quite know how to deal with the after-effects.

Adding sex to the friendship changes the dynamics of the relationship and most people (imo) are not prepared for that change in feelings and don't quite know how to deal with the after-effects.


NOW you tell me!

NOW you tell me!


Oh, well, I just figured it out  :-\\

NOW you tell me!


This raises many interesting questions...

But none of them are as fun as the aforementioned act.

So today i was telling my friend that girls rule this would and have most men rapped around their finger?
do u think this is true

Yep, good advice.  This girl wouldn't have made that great a friend in the long term -- she needs to learn a bit about herself, hm?  The whole "friends with benefits" thing isn't all it's cracked up to be.  Few people can really sustain that kind of 'friendship' and more often than not neither the friendship nor the intimacy grows very much.  Adding sex to the friendship changes the dynamics of the relationship and most people (imo) are not prepared for that change in feelings and don't quite know how to deal with the after-effects.



FWB can be fun.

So today i was telling my friend that girls rule this would and have most men rapped around their finger?
do u think this is true



Sort of.  I think it is easy to get a guy wrapped around your finger and get your way with a lot of stuff, but for most men there is a limit.  Not only that, each man probably only lets one woman have some sort of control over him.  All the other women in his life don't have the same kind of power.  Men have a lot of power over women too.

I don't know if that even made sense.

Sort of.  I think it is easy to get a guy wrapped around your finger and get your way with a lot of stuff, but for most men there is a limit.  Not only that, each man probably only lets one woman have some sort of control over him.  All the other women in his life don't have the same kind of power.  Men have a lot of power over women too.

I don't know if that even made sense.



... Nope! :)

Sort of.  I think it is easy to get a guy wrapped around your finger and get your way with a lot of stuff, but for most men there is a limit.  Not only that, each man probably only lets one woman have some sort of control over him.  All the other women in his life don't have the same kind of power.  Men have a lot of power over women too.

I don't know if that even made sense.


yes it did, have u ever "tied a guy around your finger"

So today i was telling my friend that girls rule this would and have most men rapped around their finger?
do u think this is true


No.

FWB can be fun.


Sure it can.  Lots of fun.  But it doesn't necessarily help the relationship in the long term.  I've seen it work, but rarely.  I've also seen big problems, mostly because one person tends to decide afterwards that their feelings are stronger than they thought.

yes it did, have u ever "tied a guy around your finger"


I have had a few guys tired around my finger, but I never took advantage of it because I don't think that it's right to do.  

I have dated guys that would have done anything I asked of them.  I lost interest in them very quickly because I don't want somebody that I can control, I like an equal balance.  I like men to be strong and have self respect.

I have had a few guys tired around my finger, but I never took advantage of it because I don't think that it's right to do. 

I have dated guys that would have done anything I asked of them.  I lost interest in them very quickly because I don't want somebody that I can control, I like an equal balance.  I like men to be strong and have self respect.



Well, I like men that are strong and have self-respect as well, but dating a guy who will do what you ask him to do does have it's benefits, you know.  ;)

Friends can lead to a long term sexual relationship

I have been reading through these post and I have learned quite a few things.

One is, everyone who posted here probably took an assessment of all their friends
of the opposite sex. I can see you  now, sitting there saying, yes, yes, maybe,
definitely not. You know what, thats okay, sex is part of our culture. It's our
ability to control our urges that make us unique to the animal kingdom.

The second is, the bonds of friendship are stronger then the urge of sex. Many post
stated that sex would ruin a friendship, and the friendship was more important and not
worth losing.

The third is, all the talks I gave to the boy about sex seemed to go in one ear and out
the other.

I guess to some people, the friendship comes AFTER the sex.  :D



Or before

i had this friend of mine who said, once a girl says she feels "safe' around you, or that you're -- gag -- "harmless," you're sunk. so i was chasing this one chick around the maypole, at one point she tells me she feels "safe" around me cuz i'm so "harmless" and i get really pissed off, and tell her all the screwed up sheesh i've ever done in my life -- and end up baggin' her that very night!

resulted in a really pointless and crappy three-year relationship, so that's a problem, but i'm just sayin'...

I myself can't be friends I want a girlfriend for life

The third is, all the talks I gave to the boy about sex seemed to go in one ear and out
the other.




;D

I have dated guys that would have done anything I asked of them.  I lost interest in them very quickly because I don't want somebody that I can control, I like an equal balance.  I like men to be strong and have self respect.


I think this is one of the big misconceptions men have about women (probably due to the old fairy tales) that a chivalrous knight has got to go and perform huge challenges in order to win his 'damsel in distress'. It's not the 'how far does one man go to win his love' that gets the respect of his woman - it's the fact that he's a tough man that commands respect by the things that he does.

Besides, I wince and get irritated everytime I see a man lose his dignity in front of a woman. I know one guy who lets a woman live with him free of paying rent - while she sleeps in the bed and he sleeps on the floor! If that was me, she wouldn't be anywhere near me let alone sleeping in my house, lol.

I think this is one of the big misconceptions men have about women (probably due to the old fairy tales) that a chivalrous knight has got to go and perform huge challenges in order to win his 'damsel in distress'. It's not the 'how far does one man go to win his love' that gets the respect of his woman - it's the fact that he's a tough man that commands respect by the things that he does.

Besides, I wince and get irritated everytime I see a man lose his dignity in front of a woman. I know one guy who lets a woman live with him free of paying rent - while she sleeps in the bed and he sleeps on the floor! If that was me, she wouldn't be anywhere near me let alone sleeping in my house, lol.




I had a friend who let his girlfriend control everything.  It went so far that when they got married he took her last name.  This was a big strong guy too, 6'7" and played football for the Arizona Cardinals.  So sad.

I had a friend who let his girlfriend control everything.  It went so far that when they got married he took her last name.  This was a big strong guy too, 6'7" and played football for the Arizona Cardinals.  So sad.


Pussy-whipped.

Pussy-whipped.


Vagina Whipped?

Vagina Whipped?


Erm . . . Nah. Just to describe a man with no backbone.

Erm . . . Nah. Just to describe a man with no backbone.


Um...too much sex on my brain

Um...too much sex on my brain


It could be a motivating factor for a man who doesn't want his partner upset in any way.

I had a friend who let his girlfriend control everything.  It went so far that when they got married he took her last name.  This was a big strong guy too, 6'7" and played football for the Arizona Cardinals.  So sad.
ew. i'm starting to think davey's right, some people need to just be put out of their misery.

It could be a motivating factor for a man who doesn't want his partner upset in any way.


You could be right

I have a an acquaintance, can't really call her a friend, who is very controlling.
She has to have everything her way, or no way. Needless to say, she is very
lonely.

There is a big difference between controlling and in control. My wife controls
the household but I am, by no means, "whipped". She is just better organized
then I am.

There is a big difference between controlling and in control. My wife controls
the household but I am, by no means, "whipped". She is just better organized
then I am.


That's understandable. That was exactly me and my ex's arrangement. She controlled the finances and the stuff I didn't want to deal with.

I got the feeling my ex thought I was whipped and could easily be controlled - as I say, now she is my ex.  :)

That's understandable. That was exactly me and my ex's arrangement. She controlled the finances and the stuff I didn't want to deal with.

I got the feeling my ex thought I was whipped and could easily be controlled - as I say, now she is my ex.  :)



Yes, the fastest way to push someone away is to try to control them. Put a leash around them and they'll
want to run. I've been lucky in that aspect, my wife doesn't want to rein me in.

Yes, the fastest way to push someone away is to try to control them. Put a leash around them and they'll
want to run. I've been lucky in that aspect, my wife doesn't want to rein me in.


That's a very good thing indeed, Loki. Sometimes you've got to let her know who really wears the pants once in a while.  ;)

ew. i'm starting to think davey's right, some people need to just be put out of their misery.


Dude.. he played for the Arizona Cardinals. The man obviously had so much pain in his life, a little more wouldn't make any difference.

I have a an acquaintance, can't really call her a friend, who is very controlling.
She has to have everything her way, or no way.

I know a lady who's like this too.  She's 40 and she's been married five times.