The woman who sits infront of me in state government, because she has been hitting on me. Well, its not because she hits on me, its because she hits on me and I happen to be anti-social and a woman I like approaching me scares the living crap out of me. We have class only on Tuesdays and Thursdays, so I was looking forward to talking to her for 5 days. All I managed to say today was "how was your weekend", my stomach hurt again, like the first time, too. I also could not hold eye contact. All she really initiated convowise my way was "do you have an extra pen?" and I said "no, but you can still still use this one" and then at the end of class she asked if she could borrow it until Thursday; I said it was fine. Then she said "see you test day"(we have a test next time the class meets).

I dunno, this feels weird. Some guys on another board said that she was giving off the "I like you" signals(leaning in, making eye contact, smiling, playing with her hair etc.) just so she can take advantage of me. They came to this conclusion after I explained i am the brainy one in class who always answers the instructor's questions. They said manipulative women in college will pick out a nerd in a particular class, and be "flirty" with him just so he will allow himself to be used like a tool. Several said they had it happen to them early in college.

I think they may be right. I can't really tell if this woman is genuine or not.

This post is from the things that creep you out thread.

I didn't really get a response so, yeah..

I think maybe the direct approach might be the best. After class ask her if she wants to go get a cup of coffee or something. I think how she responds will tell you if she is genuine. Even if she can't go right then but yet wants to take a rain check, there's your answer. But if she makes all sorts of excuses in the book, that's your answer, too.




Cat

I get those signals from a few girls.. they don't mean anything.

I think maybe the direct approach might be the best. After class ask her if she wants to go get a cup of coffee or something. I think how she responds will tell you if she is genuine. Even if she can't go right then but yet wants to take a rain check, there's your answer. But if she makes all sorts of excuses in the book, that's your answer, too.




Cat


Thanks, Cat. I was thinking about that, actually. Coffee shop and all, lol. Because there is one on campus..



I get those signals from a few girls.. they don't mean anything.


Hmm, you could very well be right. I hate when women are flirty with you even though they aren't interested.

A quote that fits is from Batman Returns. Penguin says to Catwoman "you lousy manx! you sent out all the signals!".

Hmm, you could very well be right. I hate when women are flirty with you even though they aren't interested.

A quote that fits is from Batman Returns. Penguin says to Catwoman "you lousy manx! you sent out all the signals!".

3 of my past experiences have turned out so... just going on what I've seen.

I feel like the plague.

Look, I'm one of the last people on Earth to proffer advice on this subject (honestly!), but I've been 'around the block' longer than either of you, so...

...ask!

Because if you don't ask, you don't get...

...and if you didn't get when you asked, at least you tried...

(Okay, there's always the fear of rejection...point taken...but you can see where I'm coming from here!)

Look, I'm one of the last people on Earth to proffer advice on this subject (honestly!), but I've been 'around the block' longer than either of you, so...

...ask!

Because if you don't ask, you don't get...

...and if you didn't get when you asked, at least you tried...

(Okay, there's always the fear of rejection...point taken...but you can see where I'm coming from here!)


This is definitely good advice, Alex.

'Faint injun never won fair maiden' was what my grandad said to me - very true that.  :)

I think i'll just tell her to please leave me alone.

I think i'll just tell her to please leave me alone.



why would you tell her that? ???  She may very well be interested in you, at least as a friend or maybe even more. Don't give up the ship before setting sail.  Like it was suggested before, ask her for coffee, or maybe to get together to study or something....if she says no, or acts like she's not interested...than at least you can say that you've tried.



Erin :)

Because i think shes just trying to use me. I've only known her for a few classes and she is already borrowing things from me, and she said "see you on TEST day". i bet she will try to get me to help her on the test. This has happened before in high school. They pick out a nerdy guy and give him false hopes so he will do things for them..I know the game.

Because i think shes just trying to use me. I've only known her for a few classes and she is already borrowing things from me, and she said "see you on TEST day". i bet she will try to get me to help her on the test. This has happened before in high school. They pick out a nerdy guy and give him false hopes so he will do things for them..I know the game.


Just because you had that experience in high school, don't assume it will happen in college.  Not all women or girls are the same.  I know it is hard not to base opinions on past experiences but try not to.  She could be the real thing, you never know until you try.  If all she wants is help with her test then dump her.  Give it a shot.

Just because you had that experience in high school, don't assume it will happen in college.   Not all women or girls are the same.  I know it is hard not to base opinions on past experiences but try not to.  She could be the real thing, you never know until you try.  If all she wants is help with her test then dump her.  Give it a shot.



I totally agree with you Dagwood...maybe she is very genuine, but just shy...and she's perhaps just grasping at straws to find something to talk about or some common ground.




Erin :)

Because i think shes just trying to use me. I've only known her for a few classes and she is already borrowing things from me, and she said "see you on TEST day". i bet she will try to get me to help her on the test. This has happened before in high school. They pick out a nerdy guy and give him false hopes so he will do things for them..I know the game.


It may be that she said see you on test day because that is the next time she expects to see you.
She may be borrowing things as an excuse to talk to you.
If you don't ask her to at least go for a coffee, you will always wonder if you should have.
I know it's hard to face possible rejection but you will never know how she feels unless you take the chance.

This post is from the things that creep you out thread.

I didn't really get a response so, yeah..


I have a question: Is this a woman (like over 25 or so) or is this a "girl" (under 25). I mean, I don't really consider myself a "woman" even though I am fully a woman because when I hear woman, for some reason I think of someone in their late 20's and later. So, this may determine also why she's making the moves and so on.. "girls" make moves differently than "women" do. Older women are more cultured at it, whereas the teeny bopper crowds are more forward.

And sometimes girls just borrowing things is not all too uncommon in college. I found I was more forward in college than in High School because I felt we were grown ups now and the games kids play in high school are much different in college. Plus, it just felt like the pressure was taken off now. I felt like I didn't have to parade in the coolest trends or compete like girls do in High School. People are just more down to earth in College. So, she may just be friendly and comfortable with you - and who knows, she may like you!  But, just with those signals, I would wait a bit longer to ask her out or anything. Try to find more out for a tad bit longer... If she likes you, she'll hold out..

I have a question: Is this a woman (like over 25 or so) or is this a "girl" (under 25). I mean, I don't really consider myself a "woman" even though I am fully a woman because when I hear woman, for some reason I think of someone in their late 20's and later. So, this may determine also why she's making the moves and so on.. "girls" make moves differently than "women" do. Older women are more cultured at it, whereas the teeny bopper crowds are more forward.

And sometimes girls just borrowing things is not all too uncommon in college. I found I was more forward in college than in High School because I felt we were grown ups now and the games kids play in high school are much different in college. Plus, it just felt like the pressure was taken off now. I felt like I didn't have to parade in the coolest trends or compete like girls do in High School. People are just more down to earth in College. So, she may just be friendly and comfortable with you - and who knows, she may like you! But, just with those signals, I would wait a bit longer to ask her out or anything. Try to find more out for a tad bit longer... If she likes you, she'll hold out..


I agree with this - and pretty much everyone else who has posted too (oh yeah, I'm 24 and still feel way too young to think of myself as a "man" man - though a "young man" perhaps!).

Anyway, in short, you're looking at a guy who is, for the most part, kinda afraid to "take the first step" with a girl - so hey dude, I'd love to be in your situation, lol. I believe some girls/women also realize guys can be shy about that, so there's a possibility she's trying to initiate it. Maybe she brings up tests and such, just 'cause you guys have a class together so it's like "common ground" to talk about?

If she is just "using" you for test answers for instance, well that would be pretty scr*wed up, but as others have pointed out, it's best to try and see for yourself first just to make sure that's not what it is.

Maybe try talking to her before/after/during class about other stuff, just to slowly make yourself more comfortable around her.

If ever you do go out, suggesting to get coffee for instance, is a good choice -- it's like not quite a "date" but it's still kinda "going out" so it's the perfect medium (and hey, I've even done that!). ;)

Hey, if I want a friend I'll go talk to a grown woman, not the "Young women"(as some might put it) that are at my college(well there are probably a few who are grown..). I don't see what reason I'd have to be putting in time with these college chicks other than for "dating" purposes.


I have a question: Is this a woman (like over 25 or so) or is this a "girl" (under 25). I mean, I don't really consider myself a "woman" even though I am fully a woman because when I hear woman, for some reason I think of someone in their late 20's and later. So, this may determine also why she's making the moves and so on.. "girls" make moves differently than "women" do. Older women are more cultured at it, whereas the teeny bopper crowds are more forward.

And sometimes girls just borrowing things is not all too uncommon in college. I found I was more forward in college than in High School because I felt we were grown ups now and the games kids play in high school are much different in college. Plus, it just felt like the pressure was taken off now. I felt like I didn't have to parade in the coolest trends or compete like girls do in High School. People are just more down to earth in College. So, she may just be friendly and comfortable with you - and who knows, she may like you!  But, just with those signals, I would wait a bit longer to ask her out or anything. Try to find more out for a tad bit longer... If she likes you, she'll hold out..


I am the opposite in college. I don't feel like I can talk to people. I have gone completely anti-social. I still haven't INITIATED even one conversation. To be frank, I am not very impressed with the calibre of "folk" at my college, but, its not like I have another well to draw friends from. Well, my uncle. I enjoy hanging around with his people. Especially Mike(who i mentioned before, musician, related to a member of the Shins).

You know, other than my cousin Justin(who I've known and been best friends with since I was 5), and Keith(guy from my high school, has a similar feeling about his peers), I don't think I have much ability to relate to or even like people in my age group. I am SO in sync with hanging around adults ALL THE TIME I don't internalize my age very well. Even though I am young, I honestly look at people in my age group, for the most part, as "varmits", to quote Yosamite Sam. ;D

Hey, if I want a friend I'll go talk to a grown woman, not the "Young women"(as some might put it) that are at my college(well there are probably a few who are grown..). I don't see what reason I'd have to be putting in time with these college chicks other than for "dating" purposes.

I am the opposite in college. I don't feel like I can talk to people. I have gone completely anti-social. I still haven't INITIATED even one conversation. To be frank, I am not very impressed with the calibre of "folk" at my college, but, its not like I have another well to draw friends from. Well, my uncle. I enjoy hanging around with his people. Especially Mike(who i mentioned before, musician, related to a member of the Shins).

You know, other than my cousin Justin(who I've known and been best friends with since I was 5), and Keith(guy from my high school, has a similar feeling about his peers), I don't think I have much ability to relate to or even like people in my age group. I am SO in sync with hanging around adults ALL THE TIME I don't internalize my age very well. Even though I am young, I honestly look at people in my age group, for the most part, as "varmits", to quote Yosamite Sam. ;D


Well, I was a lot like you, too (some 6-7 years ago) I never initiated anything as far as relationships went and I was very, very quiet (still am, to a point). I kinda "chose" to be that way, too. I was very absorbed with school and my studies so I said, "The h*ll with them, lol" A few guys asked me out and so I tried a few dates here and there, but I was really bored with these guys my age. I couldn't relate to them at all! (still can't) But, when I got into college, I realised there were some half-witted people out there and those people were some of my professors. Those were and still are the ones I can really relate to. I've been in college for four years - still haven't met one potential partner and have only made one lasting friendship! Of course, maybe for my criteria I may be asking too much from someone, but I guess that's the way things go...

So, hey, you'll be in college for awhile and I am sure if you're getting hit on now, then you'll probably get it many more times so I guess you'll have to either adjust to it or just ignore it..

I totally agree with ^ and ^^ - I've been in that boat too. Still am, to a lesser degree.

In my childhood, and even most of the teen years, I usually hated "kid" stuff and way preferred adult company - I didn't relate to my peers as well, I felt like I couldn't really open up with them too much.

The friends my own age I did have were usually the cooler/more adult-like ones anyway.

As a result of my first, approx 16 years of life, I believe I got a much better "overall" look at the world as opposed to more "age-centric" views some people have. Now though, I can basically get along with anyone. I realize more and more that everyone's different - it completely just depends person to person.

There's some 19 year olds that are way more mature than some 45 year olds.

But in short (though this also varies), I tend to think people in college are almost naturally more mature. They're there by choice unlike some high school punks, who only attend so they don't get dropped out - but they're miserable about having to be there so they act like jerks and such.

Like I said, best advice I can give (though I don't know either of you obviously, so it's harder to say) is just try being casual friends for the time being. At least initate smalltalk perhaps.

I'm sorry, but that sounds really offensive. How are you going to know if you want to date them (other than just sex) if you don't get to know them as friends first? Very RARELY does a "relationship" work out if you don't start as friends. Trust me, I've had PLENTY of them. If you're going to automatically assume that all of the other college "folk" are "varmints", then I don't see how you can complain that you haven't got many friends. Honestly, if I know someone thinks they're "better than me" (which is how you sound), then I have no desire to be ANYTHING to them...friend OR girlfriend.



A friend relationship vis a vis a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship is totally different. Becoming "friends"(boy theres a loaded term) with a chick first is how you DON'T get with them. You can't place yourself in what I call the "friend's zone", and then get out. You have to establish yourself as a boyfriend or possible boyfriend figure as soon as possible. Theres a window of time involved before you are banished to the friend's column. I've learned the hard way. The definition of insanity is doing something the same way over and over again expecting different results.

A friend relationship vis a vis a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship is totally different. Becoming "friends"(boy theres a loaded term) with a chick first is how you DON'T get with them. You can't place yourself in what I call the "friend's zone", and then get out. You have to establish yourself as a boyfriend or possible boyfriend figure as soon as possible. Theres a window of time involved before you are banished to the friend's column. I've learned the hard way. The definition of insanity is doing something the same way over and over again expecting different results.


But you've got to get to know someone first at least a little before dating them.  I knew my husband for two years before we finally got together.  The only times I dated someone who I didn't know very much it lasted one or two dates and that's it.

Well I don't think I'm looking for a potential wife here. I'm only 18(going on lol)! :D

I wanna dodge that bullet as long as I can.

Well I don't think I'm looking for a potential wife here. I'm only 18(going on lol)! :D

I wanna dodge that bullet as long as I can.


I agree Alex. At 18 you don't know what you want (I'm not sure I know what I want in any part of my life now  ;D). When you have been in a couple of relationships and know what you want then it might be okay to consider marriage.  ;)

bump.

Oh, btw, she didnt cheat. Infact she finished the test before me! :D

She didnt give me my pen back, but, she gave me one(a different one) because i needed one today. And i didn't even have to ask.

I wanted to get her phone number, but the instructor told us whenever we finished with the test we could leave. So she left before me. I left about two minutes later but she took off way too quickly. I looked all over campus, but couldnt find her. :(

STUPID PROFESSOR C0(KBLOCKED ME! >:(

:( My weekend is completely ruined now.


Hey, thanks for telling me how to get a "chick" to like you, I guess this "chick" has been doing it wrong her entire life. Like karen, I knew my husband as a friend for well over a year before we started dating and we were such good friends that he set me up with a couple of HIS friends before we got together. Every other relationship I had started from the get-go as boyfriend/girlfriend and they didn't work but the one that started as friendship has lasted 11+ years. I guess, based on your vast knowledge of dating dos and don'ts I was just one of the "unlucky" ones ::)


I'm not interested in being friends. Thats just how I am.

I'm not interested in being friends. Thats just how I am.

I heard a quote.. something about how a man can't be friends with a woman he finds attractive.. I forget where it was from, though.. but it makes a lot of sense to me.. although I can stay on decent friend terms.. just don't prefer it. And I'm worried for my currrent situation.. I'm viewed probably in a worse position then "friend".

I agree Alex. At 18 you don't know what you want (I'm not sure I know what I want in any part of my life now  ;D). When you have been in a couple of relationships and know what you want then it might be okay to consider marriage.  ;)




At 31,I still don't know what I want ;D

I heard a quote.. something about how a man can't be friends with a woman he finds attractive.. I forget where it was from, though.. but it makes a lot of sense to me.. although I can stay on decent friend terms.. just don't prefer it. And I'm worried for my currrent situation.. I'm viewed probably in a worse position then "friend".


'Tis true with me. I've had lots of female friends, but I wasn't attracted to them anyway.

God im p!$$ed. i HATE that instructor now. >:(

God im p!$$ed. i HATE that instructor now. >:(



What did he do Alex?

I wish people would be understanding of the fact I can't make friends if I like them.



What did he do Alex?


He cblocked me. :(

I wish people would be understanding of the fact I can't make friends if I like them.

He cblocked me. :(



He blocked you in what way? ???

He c***blocked me. In other words, he cut me off from an oppurtunity with a lady.

He c***blocked me. In other words, he cut me off from an oppurtunity with a lady.


So,you wanted to ask her out? ???

I wanted to get her phone number at least, yeah. But she left befor I could. :(

Why did he have to say we could leave when we finished?

If you want to get to know her, you have to talk to her. Women are shy too, ;)  Don't give up.

Maybe i could that if i could have got her number. I'll have an everlasting dislike for this instructor from now on..>:(

I wanted to get her phone number at least, yeah. But she left befor I could. :(

Why did he have to say we could leave when we finished?



Was it possible that you could've caught up to her?

Maybe i could that if i could have got her number. I'll have an everlasting dislike for this instructor from now on..>:(




don't fret Alex..I am sure you will have other opportunites to get her number or talk with her again.....the semester is still young....give it a chance.




Erin :)

Was it possible that you could've caught up to her?


I would have thought so, but apparently not. I only left about two minutes after her, and we were on the second floor of a building in the middle of a college campus. I looked all OVER. But she was just gone.


don't fret Alex..I am sure you will have other opportunites to get her number or talk with her again.....the semester is still young....give it a chance.




Erin :)


That doesnt matter because my weekend is ruined. Thats why im upset.

I would have thought so, but apparently not. I only left about two minutes after her, and we were on the second floor of a building in the middle of a college campus. I looked all OVER. But she was just gone.
That doesnt matter because my weekend is ruined. Thats why im upset.



Maybe she just went home Alex

Your weekend isn't ruined.  So, you didn't get her number, TODAY.  Don't you guys have to check into class every so often?  ;)  Get it when you can.  But by then , there might be another HOTTIE coming around the corner.  :P

Nevermind. :\'(

Sorry, I was being emo..

Sorry, I was being emo..


It's all good - believe it, I've had tons of cr@ppy days myself.

I might be in the minority here, but I'm the type who prefers to start off as friends - I not only find that easier, but think about this - there's far less awkwardness if ever you're in a relationship. You already "know" alot about each other already.

Yeah, I've heard of the When Harry Met Sally thing -- and while some guys have that train of thought, I don't. Me being as I am, it doesn't matter how cute a female friend might be, it doesn't change my opinons of 'em as being just friends.

P.S. However, I do think this is an interesting conversation - I do like seeing the other side of the issue as well. If everyone agreed, wouldn't that be boring as h*ll anyway? ;)

Just realized; tommorrow is Tuesday.

Hmm, I wonder what I should do tommorrow.

I don't think I am ready to ask her for her number, and I'm definitely not ready to ask her somewhere.

I have to build my social skills, slowly.

Today in algebra right before class started I smiled and waved at this girl who sits on the front row whom I find kinda pretty. Funny thing is I've never even spoken to her or vice versa. She smiled and waved back...then I looked away from her and down at the floor or my notebook most of the rest of class; with my cap pulled down over my face. ;D ;D

I looked at my notebook and the floor because I like my algebra teacher too, and I always get nervous looking at her so I look at the board but never at her. If she comes up close to my desk I look away. ;D

No, Marty, I don't think you're in the minority. Anyone who's ever HAD a relationship knows that it's better to know something about a person before you become involved with them romantically. MOST girls, when a guy starts out on the "I wanna 'date' you" kick think that all he wants to "date" them for is sex and unless they're easy, they're not gonna go for that. Then again, maybe that's what Alex wants, that's certainly how it sounds to me ???


Sounds that way to me, too.  Speaking from a woman's point of view I would rather start as friends.  I don't want to get into a relationship with someone I have nothing in common with or find out I don't get along with.  Guys just looking to hop into bed would have to go elsewhere, that don't fly with most women.

No, Marty, I don't think you're in the minority. Anyone who's ever HAD a relationship knows that it's better to know something about a person before you become involved with them romantically. MOST girls, when a guy starts out on the "I wanna 'date' you" kick think that all he wants to "date" them for is sex and unless they're easy, they're not gonna go for that. Then again, maybe that's what Alex wants, that's certainly how it sounds to me ???


Man, it seems sometimes like women just don't get it. If you mean I don't want a serious relationship; then you're absolutely correct. But I think you are trying to imply that because I don't want a serious relationship I must want to just have sex with her and kick her to the curb. Neither actually. I want to be friends with her, but sexual friends. To me, when I think "girlfriend", I think "f buddy". You know?

So please, don't get on your high horse.

Man, it seems sometimes like women just don't get it. If you mean I don't want a serious relationship; then you're absolutely correct. But I think you are trying to imply that because I don't want a serious relationship I must want to just have sex with her and kick her to the curb. Neither actually. I want to be friends with her, but sexual friends. To me, when I think "girlfriend", I think "f buddy". You know?

So please, don't get on your high horse.


Hey Alex, if the "f" is what I think it is.. hmmm, that has me wondering. C'mon... it's hard to have a relationship with someone and kind of consider them as that. I mean, it feels a little demeaning in a way.

Man, it seems sometimes like women just don't get it. If you mean I don't want a serious relationship; then you're absolutely correct. But I think you are trying to imply that because I don't want a serious relationship I must want to just have sex with her and kick her to the curb. Neither actually. I want to be friends with her, but sexual friends. To me, when I think "girlfriend", I think "f buddy". You know?

So please, don't get on your high horse.




well with an attitude like that....good luck. ;)  Women/Girls should be thought of as MUCH more than F*** buddies.









Erin

Oh, ok. Well (whatyouwanttohear), and (whatyouwanttohear). (whatyouwanttohear)?

I think thats what you wanted, wasn't it? :D ;D

And you know what? I don't care if most women feel that way. Personally, I feel its very immature to assign emotion baggage to a PHYSICAL act. But the thing is, there ARE women who have the right attitude about sex so guys like me(who I am sure you oh so despise) WILL get what it is we want; whether or not those who feel the way you do about it like it or not.

So agree to disagree.

Anyway, lets try to get back on-topic here. Ok?

Hey Alex, if the "f" is what I think it is.. hmmm, that has me wondering. C'mon... it's hard to have a relationship with someone and kind of consider them as that. I mean, it feels a little demeaning in a way.


I don't see why. The only reason a person could RATIONALLY see it as demeaning is if they don't really like sex. And, I don't know, perhaps that applies to most women afterall..

I don't see why. The only reason a person could RATIONALLY see it as demeaning is if they don't really like sex. And, I don't know, perhaps that applies to most women afterall..


Hmmmm, don't get my feather's ruffled here... Women like sex - enough said.
I find it demeaning because it SOUNDS demeaning. I wouldn't even call my best friend that. THAT's what I meant by demeaning. You're a friend for a reason, not a "f buddy."

Yeah you probably liked something about eachother's personalities when you first met that LED to the situation, but ultimately, "f buddy" is an accurate term because just calling them a friend would be a dishonest term if you were having sex, but if you called her your girlfriend and you arent actually "steady", then that would be false also. So i think f buddy is the term that works the best.

Oh, ok. Well (whatyouwanttohear), and (whatyouwanttohear). (whatyouwanttohear)?

I think thats what you wanted, wasn't it? :D ;D

And you know what? I don't care if most women feel that way. Personally, I feel its very immature to assign emotion baggage to a PHYSICAL act. But the thing is, there ARE women who have the right attitude about sex so guys like me(who I am sure you oh so despise) WILL get what it is we want; whether or not those who feel the way you do about it like it or not.

So agree to disagree.

Anyway, lets try to get back on-topic here. Ok?



You seem to get into arguments a lot.... anyway, really... yeah, they should be more than that, ALEX! They can be fun to talk to also!  but then again, what do I know?

Yeah you probably liked something about eachother's personalities when you first met that LED to the situation, but ultimately, "f buddy" is an accurate term because just calling them a friend would be a dishonest term if you were having sex, but if you called her your girlfriend and you arent actually "steady", then that would be false also. So i think f buddy is the term that works the best.


It's just common knowledge that girlfriend or boyfriend is the term for someone you're going steady with. It isn't necessarily false either (yeah, you are friends and you probably spend over 75% of your time together out of the bed anyway). I mean, it's not like people have to know you're having sex with this person - there's nothing wrong with being a little discreet about it. I mean, you're not going to introduce her to ma and pa and say "This is my f-buddy, oh, yeah - and THAT's exactly what we do! No need in hiding it!"

Well I don't have well-liked opinions, Mr.Spud. And sometimes, it seems, people just want to be judgemental. Its a pity.


It's just common knowledge that girlfriend or boyfriend is the term for someone you're going steady with. It isn't necessarily false either (yeah, you are friends and you probably spend over 75% of your time together out of the bed anyway). I mean, it's not like people have to know you're having sex with this person - there's nothing wrong with being a little discreet about it. I mean, you're not going to introduce her to ma and pa and say "This is my f-buddy, oh, yeah - and THAT's exactly what we do! No need in hiding it!"


Heh. You didn't grow up in my house then! Just to give you an idea about my dad:

Back when I was 13, because I asked, he told me the story of when he lost his virginity. He brought some girl home from a party and they had sex in his bedroom, and he came out into the kitchen to get a drink of water and my grandmother was standing there and said "I know what you were doing in there, I KNOW!!" and he said "oh really, what? what were we doing??" and she ran back into her room. ;D

So, that last point you made - don't be so sure about that.

Well I don't have well-liked opinions, Mr.Spud. And sometimes, it seems, people just want to be judgemental. Its a pity.

Heh. You didn't grow up in my house then! Just to give you an idea about my dad:

Back when I was 13, because I asked, he told me the story of when he lost his virginity. He brought some girl home from a party and they had sex in his bedroom, and he came out into the kitchen to get a drink of water and my grandmother was standing there and said "I know what you were doing in there, I KNOW!!" and he said "oh really, what? what were we doing??" and she ran back into her room. ;D

So, that last point you made - don't be so sure about that.


well i'm sure your girlfriend wouldn't like being introduced that way

just hope she doesn't read this thread!

Well I don't have well-liked opinions, Mr.Spud. And sometimes, it seems, people just want to be judgemental. Its a pity.

Heh. You didn't grow up in my house then! Just to give you an idea about my dad:

Back when I was 13, because I asked, he told me the story of when he lost his virginity. He brought some girl home from a party and they had sex in his bedroom, and he came out into the kitchen to get a drink of water and my grandmother was standing there and said "I know what you were doing in there, I KNOW!!" and he said "oh really, what? what were we doing??" and she ran back into her room. ;D

So, that last point you made - don't be so sure about that.


Hey, I'm not really being judgemental. I guess that term is just very disrespectful and coming from my household, I guess that just isn't used quite as lightly. And heck, just because you lived in that household, doesn't mean you have to adhere to that way of thinking or that that's the way it is. You can be better than that. You could earn a lot of women's respect if they knew that eventually you weren't going to throw them to the wayside and not really care that much for who they were. You seemed smarter than that, Alex.  :-[

just hope she doesn't read this thread!



LOL!! He doesn't have one. Whew, go figure, right?  ::)


Beth

LOL!! He doesn't have one. Whew, go figure, right?  ::)


Beth


well, i meant the person he wants to go out with

So let me get this straight..you are all judging my worth as a person based off my views on sex?

:D Yes, you sure do have the higher ground!

So let me get this straight..you are all judging my worth as a person based off my views on sex?

:D Yes, you sure do have the higher ground!




You posted this thread, so we could give you our opinions--That's exactly what they're doing. Alex, I will admit, that what you said sounded like a complete jerk, and I know for a fact that no girl will EVER want to date you with that sort of mentality (Unless she's a slut, and has 3,231 other guys besides you, as well). All I can say is, buddy, get used to the single life  ;) I'm not being mean, I'm being realistic.


Beth

I didn't post this thread so we could have "Lets judge someone as a whole based on a few statements!" thread.

But anyway, i didnt say I dont believe in love. I just dont think love has to go with sex. If I meet a girl like the one in Garden State, I'll be her boyfriend. Until that time, though, theres no reason to be lonely. Thats just a drag.

I didn't post this thread so we could have "Lets judge someone as a whole based on a few statements!" thread.

But anyway, i didnt say I dont believe in love. I just dont think love has to go with sex. If I meet a girl like the one in Garden State, I'll be her boyfriend. Until that time, though, theres no reason to be lonely. Thats just a drag.






Again, I say: You'll see  ;)



Beth

See what? I am succumbing to your position. So are you trying to suggest i shouldnt date until I meet someone i am sure im going to marry? ???

Ahe.. Ahem..

As a mainly heterosexual male aged 17-32.. I have to tell you something.

Now, don't take this as me making fun of you, i'm really not.. Really.. honestly.. kinda.

"Please shut the Hell Up!"

Alex, you need to have a Serious talk with somebody about your perogatives involving women. My next statement of course is going to make me the best catch in the tri-state area..

They..Are...People! Sure, they're kinda small.. and say odd things, but they aren't your fudge BUDDY!

Please.. Please...Please.. Look at these last few pages and actually analyse what people have said. I'm not trying to ridicule you here, just inform you. As a guy who's.. done a couple of things. (I'm no Don Juan but i have a decent idea) your not going to get anywhere with the mindset you have.

Love, Andrew  :-*

Just realized; tommorrow is Tuesday.

Hmm, I wonder what I should do tommorrow.

I don't think I am ready to ask her for her number, and I'm definitely not ready to ask her somewhere.

I have to build my social skills, slowly.

Today in algebra right before class started I smiled and waved at this girl who sits on the front row whom I find kinda pretty. Funny thing is I've never even spoken to her or vice versa. She smiled and waved back...then I looked away from her and down at the floor or my notebook most of the rest of class; with my cap pulled down over my face. ;D ;D

I looked at my notebook and the floor because I like my algebra teacher too, and I always get nervous looking at her so I look at the board but never at her. If she comes up close to my desk I look away. ;D



Oh man im going to embaress myself tommorrow.

"hello, I'm George McFly, and I'm your density-I mean, your destiny.." :D ;D

My, I go away for a day and these threads grow like 2 full pages! :D



.... anyway, really... yeah, they should be more than that, ALEX! They can be fun to talk to also! but then again, what do I know?

^ Well said.

I can't really add much more to what's already been said by others since my last visit.

Even as a 100% heterosexual guy myself, I disagree with your opinions. And let's just leave it at that. ;)

To me dating without sex doesn't make sense. Sex is one of the things girlfriends and boyfriends do. You think because I see sex is a must, that somehow that means I'm not interested in other things. Wrong. I am.

I am NOT interested in long-term commitment. If thats what you define as a relationship, then no I certainly don't want that. But I said DATING. Dating means you are doing more than just having sex, but I don't think thats a term that'd imply long term commitment. As long as I can avoid the latter, I'm ok.

Btw, Stacy didn't show for class this morning. Well, perhaps Thursday, no?

And besides, maybe tommorrow in my algebra class I can talk more to that other girl I mentioned(if I can muster up the courage).

well with an attitude like that....good luck. ;)  Women/Girls should be thought of as MUCH more than F*** buddies.









Erin


Women should be treated with the utmost respect.

I don't know. I don't really trust marriage. I watched my mom cheat on my dad and leave him(the man fell apart, and ended up in prison, she put him there too) after 23 years of marriage. Or even if a marriage doesnt end with the man being "screwed over", and it keeps going, it sucks him dry. I see it with my brother. He got married at 21 to an older woman with three kids(that was real smart), and the last 6(nearly 7) years he has lived with her in her parent's house with 3 kids plus one they had together. He spends ALL of his time with them. I can never spend time one-on-one with him because he ALWAYS has the baby, and those lazy piece of **** in-laws apparently just won't babysit. Its like my brother died, hes gone. In his place is a boring, automaton(sp?) "family man" who is being sucked dry by everyone out at that house and hes not even 30!

I'll die and go to h3ll before I allow that to happen to me.

Is that good or bad?

Bump..

Do what makes you feel good. Just remember to use protection all the time , so NO accidents happen and you won't be forced to be "sucked dry".

There are a lot of girls who only want F-buddies. You just have to be sure you want to become one ;)

;D Ok, I'll keep your advice in mind, BB. Thanks.

Sorry to bug, but i'd really like to know what crazymom meant..