You see them in the store while waiting in line.  Corny headlines.  I thougt I'd post some here for S & G's.


POO LA LA! MAN SPEAKS FRENCH OUT OF HIS BUTT -- And he can't understand a word!

BY D.G. BULGER

LINGUISTS and proctologists from around the world are stunned by a Detroit man's unique gift ... he is able to speak fluent French out of his buttocks.

Jason Jablonski, a 40- year-old furniture salesman, began speaking French out of his butt six months ago and has been unable to stop ever since.

According to medical records, he was awakened one night last January in his bedroom by a strange voice that seemed to be coming from under his sheets.


The rest of the story..........http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/suspects/61277

I don't understand why this is so strange.  Isn't this how all the French speak? ??? ::) 

Even more absurd. ;D


Incredible New Study Proves...
GALS WHO GO TOPLESS LIVE LONGER
By Mark Miller

AN EXCITING breakthrough in aging has just been discovered -- women who go topless live longer!

"According to our research, women can add 10, 20, up to 30 years to their lives, depending on how frequently and for what duration of time they uncover their breasts," states Dr. Andrew Mansfield, director of BRIA -- the Breast Research Institute of America. "And the more they display them out in public, the longer they live."

http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/science/61498

Hahahahhahahahaahah. Those are great.  ;D

I love reading those when I'm in the grocery line. Such as "Jesus and Elvis meet on Mars!" and "Batboy!" LOL...Some people actually believe those, too!



Beth

The one I saw yesterday was "Cat found guilty of murder" I think it was also the "WWN"




I'm innocent, I tell ya! Innocent!!!!!  ;) :D ;D





Cat

The one I saw yesterday was "Cat found guilty of murder" I think it was also the "WWN"


;D ;D That was the headline that prompted me to post this ridiculous thread! ;D ;D

Hahahahhahahahaahah. Those are great.  ;D

I love reading those when I'm in the grocery line. Such as "Jesus and Elvis meet on Mars!" and "Batboy!" LOL...Some people actually believe those, too!



Beth


;D ;D  Then you should like this one. ::)

GAL WITH GREEN BABY SAYS SHE WAS RAPED BY A LEPRECHAUN
He slipped her his little shamrock

By JENNIFER HIGHTOWER

DOCTORS in Mallow, Ireland, are puzzled by the birth of a green baby. But single mom Bridget O'Leary, 26, says there's a very simple explanation -- she claims she was raped by a leprechaun.

"He had his way with me, he did," says the attractive barmaid. "He got me drunk and slipped me his little green shamrock."


http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/sex/61273

;D ;D  Then you should like this one. ::)

GAL WITH GREEN BABY SAYS SHE WAS RAPED BY A LEPRECHAUN
He slipped her his little shamrock

By JENNIFER HIGHTOWER

DOCTORS in Mallow, Ireland, are puzzled by the birth of a green baby. But single mom Bridget O'Leary, 26, says there's a very simple explanation -- she claims she was raped by a leprechaun.

"He had his way with me, he did," says the attractive barmaid. "He got me drunk and slipped me his little green shamrock."


http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/sex/61273






;D Yeah, that picture looks completely legitimate, too  ::)



Beth

Even more absurd. ;D


Incredible New Study Proves...
GALS WHO GO TOPLESS LIVE LONGER
By Mark Miller

AN EXCITING breakthrough in aging has just been discovered -- women who go topless live longer!

"According to our research, women can add 10, 20, up to 30 years to their lives, depending on how frequently and for what duration of time they uncover their breasts," states Dr. Andrew Mansfield, director of BRIA -- the Breast Research Institute of America. "And the more they display them out in public, the longer they live."

http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/science/61498



I dont know what youre talking about Chrissy, but this is completely true  ::)

We did a whole parody of the Weekly World News in Nonsense earlier this year.... Tis was good

I dont know what youre talking about Chrissy, but this is completely true  ::)

We did a whole parody of the Weekly World News in Nonsense earlier this year.... Tis was good


It's really true?  Gee I'll have to try this. :P :D

Thanks Billy! ;) ;D

This one is my favorite....  ;D

VICE PRESIDENT WAS THE BOSS EVEN AS A KID ...
LITTLE DICK CHENEY
Tot even rigged his class elections!

By AIDEN LEWIS

VICE PRESIDENT Dick Cheney hasn't changed much -- as a child, he was a tough, clever manipulator who ran roughshod over his classmates and stopped at nothing to win.

And other than growing taller and heavier, the 64-year-old politico looked pretty much the same as he does now -- even when he was in a Casper, Wyo., elementary school, say sources.

"It's amazing how he hasn't changed," recalls Jennifer Pereau, who was a classmate of the future corporate and political kingpin.

"Then, he looked like a little old man, with wispy hair and thick glasses. Now, he's finally grown into those looks."

A Weekly World News investigation into the Veep's youth uncovered that Cheney -- who many believe is the puppet master who pulls President George Bush's strings -- was mired in an election scandal when he was a 7- year-old second-grader.

Amazingly, little Dick was accused of rigging class elections at Abraham Lincoln Elementary School, say sources.

"Usually, the older kids -- sixth graders -- ran for student council president," recalls Fred C. Reggins, another classmate.

"But Cheney was always old for his age. He decided he wanted to run the school and ran for president when he was a second-grader.

"Amazingly, he won. But there were charges of rigging and ballot-box stuffing. The principal investigated, but concluded that Cheney was too young to know about such dirty tricks.

"Cheney and his campaign manager, Carlton Rovner, claim the kid was a sore loser and lying. The principal actually suspended the older kid and he wasn't allowed to graduate with his class."

Pereau recalls having a crush on little Dick in the third and fourth grades.

"It's true he looked so much older, but he reminded me of my grandfather whom I was crazy about," says the 63-year-old mom of three grown children.

Pereau says she admired his commanding manner.

"He wasn't an actual bully, because he wasn't bigger or stronger than other kids," she says. "But he had these scary piercing eyes and quiet sinister manner."

Reggins says two of the bigger boys in the school were his sidekicks and would take care of any kids who opposed little Dick.

"They were definitely bullies, but were devoted to Dick," says Reggins.

Cheney also had about a half dozen kids who were at his beck and call.

"Yeah, every morning at recess, he'd give them their orders for the day and they'd do it," says Reggins. "They'd hold places at the front of the lunch line for him, get him extra chocolate milks and cookies -- that kind of stuff."

One things for sure, Cheney had the mark of a winner even then.

"Yup, when I read he was running for Vice President, I wasn't surprised," says Reggins. "And when I heard the rumors that he was the power behind Bush -- that didn't surprise me either!"

http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/politics/61700

Hahahahhahahahaahah. Those are great.  ;D

I love reading those when I'm in the grocery line. Such as "Jesus and Elvis meet on Mars!" and "Batboy!" LOL...Some people actually believe those, too!



Beth

all the news that's fit to print. by the way, i thought they couldn't print it if it wasn't true(wink wink)