well, as Im finally done with writing and presenting a speech that I had to give today on "How to properly construct a joke" I realized that within the past, i dont know, half week, alot has happened in my life that I neglected to mention here because of lack of time....some of it good, some of it bad, but I feel that its something that probably needs to be shared...



Ill start with good.....
I was offically appointed an Executive Board member of Nonsense Humor Magazine....now I am in the upper administration of the magazine (im still a writer and artist and staff member and all, but now Im also on the E board)....more or less, Im the PR man, but I have weird responcibilitys (most of which I dont even know yet)....we just elected a new editor, so he replaced all the people on the E board that werent really doing the work, so thats why Ive been appointed to it...we are also finall putting out our new issue next week (they should come in tomarrow....)...and we are celebrating our 20th annerversery next month .......

Now for the bad news, that could have been worse, but in the end it seems to be alright.....

I have been keeping this secret from more or less everyone...I didnt even tell all my friends (and the ones I did tell I swore to secretcy until I found out the results), but about two Wenesdays ago, I went to the dermatologist because I had a weird fungal infection on my chest..but anyway, while he was examining me, he noticed a mole I had had there since more or less I was born...he looked at it and said "I dont like this"..it was bigger than a pencil eraser and not round...it was very bumpy and abstract in shape...he looked at it and told me that he's not completely sure, but that might be cancer.....
He did a biopsy and removed the mole and sent it to the lab to get checked..he told me that Id get the results back within two weeks...and then Id find out if I had mellonomia (which is the skin cancer) or if it was benign (spelling?.....which it most likely was he told me).....considering the fact that I had had it since I was born, it probably was nothing, but it may have grown and i never noticed it...that was the problem.....
if it was cancer, Id have to be operated on to see how far the cancer went...he said that this isnt anything serrious, but I dont think its that great either


two days ago the demotoligist called......

it wasnt cancer.....

well, needless to say I was releived....it was a close call though..as one of my friends put it "Wow, this hits too close to home"....
Ive been keeping it from you guys because I didnt want it spread around, and I didnt want people worrying about nothing (which it would have been), but now Im telling all of you now.......Billy's safe, he isnt dying or anything lol

I guess something good does come out of this...technicly, I can somehow fit this into my standup routine...I dont know how...actully, thats probably not a great idea, but its a common rule.....if youve experienced some kind of desease or something like it, you can make jokes about it....egh, I probably wont..Imjust happy I dont have cancer, it feels like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.....wait, I mean my chest  ;) . ...ok, one joke....lol

but to end on a happy note, I gave my speech today about how to construct a joke....somehow I managed to get in a slam of Sportsnight and Craig Kilbourne, and a former teacher I once had, and something stupid some people have done, and Memorial Hall, etc etc etc....it went well....it was like I was doing standup again, only people were laughing lol  ;)
Im a litttle disappointed though....only like two people laughed at my Sportsnight joke....I asked them afterwards "Havent you guys heard of sportsnight?"  Apparently no one remembers it?  They dont remember one of the least funniest shows to ever hit the airwaves?  Im glad I took out what I originally wrote in there...."Make sure some sort of humor is present in your punch line....dont let it be something that the writers of COP ROCK would have thought of!....It must be funny!"  I would have heard crikets after that one ......


anyway, I needed to tell you guys that......

Well, it sounds like good news all around. I'm glad your tests came back negative and everything else is going well.




Cat

Billy - glad to hear your biopsy results were okay.  What a worrying week you must have endured.   Melanomas are a big problem in our climate.  I know lots of people who have suffered.  I get my skin checked annually and my specialist said don't fall into the trap of thinking moles you've had from birth are "safe".  Quite often just the opposite applies.  

Sounds as if the rest of your life is going pretty well also. :)

Well, first and foremost Billy, terrific news about your results...I couldn't begin to imagine what a relief that must've been...

You can't be too careful with melanomas...

But I personally wouldn't try and work it into any kind of joke scenario, funny as it may appear to be...cancer, I find, is one of those 'no-no' subjects on the comedic board, and it's best left that way...

That said, it's good to hear that things seem to be 'on the up' with yourself...all the best!