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Subject: What is love?
All righty. Here's another fun one.
What do you think that the word "love" means? Don't just limit youself to one working definition. Consider and roll over in your mind the societal definitions, roots of the word, etc.
:)
Subject: Re: What is love?
Whoa! You're aiming to cause our brains to hurt, aren't ya? ;)
If you see smoke coming out of your speakers, it's probably me in deep thought. ;D
Subject: Re: What is love?
Seriously, I'll have to get back to you on this subject. Too much to type, too tired to do it. ;)
Subject: Re: What is love?
Love is never having to say you're sorry-NOT. ;)
Subject: Re: What is love?
Love is when I know I'm in love with her, but she never did. I don't feel that she didn't know, I just feel that she never wished to become the situation that I put her in. Knowing me is difficult enough as it is, I didn't want to make it more difficult by her knowing how I felt about her.
GRR, that's gonna get misinterpreted. Basically, I think that she did love me; to what extent, who knows? Is it the hurt that justifies the pain inside? Why edit my life now because of bad experiences? I made good of the better ones, and I just wish I knew what I had done back then to make the situation as bad as it is at the moment. At this moment, I regret not having taken my chance and having wanted to love her, as I used to, there and then, saying what I should've. Then, who's to say what could have happened? I thought we would have stood a great chance, and I knew I still loved her despite her straying to a friend, and I would have strove to love her still if time permitted. Unfortunately it didn't, and now I'm afraid of not seeing her for another three years - a time between which I am not looking forward to in the slightest.
I miss you Mel!!!
Subject: Re: What is love?
Okay, that was my short response, who wants to hear the long one?
Subject: Re: What is love?
Love's the opposite of hate.
Love's meaning is too capacious and personal. It is unique with each person. It's almost redundant to attempt to describe something so subjective.
Might as well ask....
What is reality? ;)
Subject: Re: What is love?
Reality? Something above comprehension, no doubt. Something awaiting to brew to above the surface when I, of all people, least expect it.
Subject: Re: What is love?
Reality is the opposite of fantasy. ;)
Reality is something that is real. That's really it in a nutshell.
Or it can be a figment of a Bizzarro world native's imagination. :D
Subject: Re: What is love?
Quoting:
Reality is the opposite of fantasy. ;)
End Quote
I placed that one just for you, J.C. ;)
Quoting:
Reality is something that is real. That's really it in a nutshell.
Or it can be a figment of a Bizzarro world native's imagination. :DEnd Quote
Ok, ok. I didn't mean to deviate the thread onto a different subject. ::)
The topic again is "What is love?". Take it away people! ;)
Subject: Re: What is love?
love is something you want to do with your mate.
you make some love.1 cup of me & 1 cup of you. :-X ;D
-howard-
Subject: Re: What is love?
Well, love. Just ask and you will receive as many opinions as people you consult with.
Love has taken on a myriad of different meanings in our world, and has been given so many faces that it is no wonder at all how such a disparity in the defining of love has come to pass. We can love a car; we also love to eat. We love our wives and husbands, our children, our friends. It can be an enthusiasm or the object of said enthusiasm.
In many cases, love can be expressed merely as a stronger version of like, and all is said and done. This definition may work adequately in some circumstances--but not all.
In the realm of relationships, love requires a definition not so simplistic. Wouldn't it be insulting to believe that you were appreciated by a family member or significant other in the same way as a candy bar (albeit possibly more strongly appreciated)?
Relational love is divided into feeling and will, two aspects that are usually blended together and taken as one. This should not be the case.
The feeling aspect is what almost everyone associates love with. Go to a dictionary, and indeed, it most likely promotes the association with feeling. Such is society. Falling in love is no more than fireworks and infatuation--short-lived brilliance with no foundation or logical explanation. Some people get it, some don't. Some receive it, but do not return it, and vice versa. There is little understanding of this process.
This is ultimately self-serving in nature, because the basis here for manifesting love is purely feelings-based, and is no more stable than the mood swings of a particular person. You can, with this definition, fall out of love. You can also fall back into it, because it is based on how you feel at a given time. Couples get married purely on speculation that the warm, fuzzy feeling that they mutually possess is basis for an extended relationship. They then discover that this feeling goes away. The butterflies leave, the heart beats normally again. "What has happened to our love? Why don't we feel like we used to? Where's the flame?" This "honeymoon" season of a relationship can go anywhere from 2 weeks or shorter to half a year or longer if left to its natural course and terminus. After the feeling leaves, there is often nothing besides the feeling to the relationship, and since it is gone, the love must be gone. The marriage is considered a failure, and divorce is an oft-reached conclusion to affairs.
The will aspect is the other, less heard-of facet of love, especially in our American society, and many are not familiar with its existence or with the principles it espouses.
It is the love that is an action first, not a feeling. Regardless of what you *feel* for a person, it is the act of will to do what is best for that person. It goes against what all of society states and lives for, because it is not self-serving, and even goes so far as to say, "put others before yourself." Promoting this type of behaviour is often met with ridicule, disbelief, and even scorn. This is not hard to believe, because, in the lives of countless people, some or any application of this rule ends up in one-way roads; no return-on-investment. Understandably, this is not the first choice of many. However, it has good points. If you want a relationship that contains consistency, this is may be an excellent first step. Doing something for your significant other not because you feel like it, not because you want to. Complimenting them; saying you appreciate them; stopping and give them a hug because you know they might want one. If they say something negative, if they correct you unkindly, don't lash out back at them--withhold snarling sarcasm or a witty retort. Say nothing, or, better yet, agree with them and appreciate their willingness to expend the energy to correct you.
This can appear uncomfortable and self-destructive... but it really helps to build relationships off of more than feelings.
Subject: Re: What is love?
Quoting:
Reality is the opposite of fantasy. ;)
End Quote
Naaah. You'd be surprised how well they blend... :-/
Subject: Re: What is love?
Okay, I'll take a stab at this one. Love (for example, your mate) is a combination of delight and well-wishing. Delight without well-wishing would be a love for an inanimate object, say, your beautiful, shiny hoopty. Well-wishing without delight is a bit cold and superior.
Subject: Re: What is love?
But I was talking from Noah Webster's point of view.
You can't even tell after 9-11. :(
Quoting:
Naaah. You'd be surprised how well they blend... :-/
End Quote
Subject: Re: What is love?
Quoting:
Reality is the opposite of fantasy. ;)
End Quote
Reality is an illusion caused by alcohol deficiency (Sheridan)
Love is where you start at tennis
Phil
Subject: Re: What is love?
Quoting:
Love is when I know I'm in love with her, but she never did. I don't feel that she didn't know, I just feel that she never wished to become the situation that I put her in. Knowing me is difficult enough as it is, I didn't want to make it more difficult by her knowing how I felt about her.
GRR, that's gonna get misinterpreted. Basically, I think that she did love me; to what extent, who knows? Is it the hurt that justifies the pain inside? Why edit my life now because of bad experiences? I made good of the better ones, and I just wish I knew what I had done back then to make the situation as bad as it is at the moment. At this moment, I regret not having taken my chance and having wanted to love her, as I used to, there and then, saying what I should've. Then, who's to say what could have happened? I thought we would have stood a great chance, and I knew I still loved her despite her straying to a friend, and I would have strove to love her still if time permitted. Unfortunately it didn't, and now I'm afraid of not seeing her for another three years - a time between which I am not looking forward to in the slightest.
I miss you Mel!!!
End Quote
Oh Bobo....
What can anyone say to that....
It happens, and it will happen again, and it will hurt again. How many times did I find myself in exactly the same situation, and other people here I'm sure.
Try not to be too hard on yourself - second guessing what might have happened can grind away at your soul until there's nothing left - so don't it get that far.
Bobo, my kids are teenagers now so they are not long off facing this situation themselves, and I dread the day when one of them comes to me with this problem, because no words can adequately describe the pain, and there really isn't any worthwhile explanation. And they are going to expect answers.
So I am going to say to them what I have found to be true (yet it will mean nothing to them until it happens) :
Love is found in the most unlikely places, and with people you would never have imagined, and it can hit you like a brick.
It's just that sometimes the wait in between is unbearable.
You offered the full version of your story - if you are serious then I for one would read it.
FussB :)
Subject: Re: What is love?
Quoting:
love is something you want to do with your mate.
you make some love.1 cup of me & 1 cup of you. :-X ;D
-howard-
End Quote
And Howard ?
That is just lovely. I'm going to use that !
FB ;)
Subject: Re: What is love?
I know, and that's what scares me about it. Fortunately (eh? - Ed). With teenage kids, I'm sure you'll go through the same thing soon, secondarily at least. Yes, yes, I know that I can get hurt extremely easily, at times I am very sensitive, and at times this sensitivity gets the better of me.
I do, however, think that it's important that I keep in touch with as many people as possible from the school which I have just left, and I feel that since this is probably just the beginning of any pain I will suffer, the least I could do is make amends. I know that she's been happy with her current boyfriend right now... the least I can consciously feel like doing right now is phoning her up once a day, talking to her about whoever and whatever is currently happening. Just this mere conversation between us, it'll never bring us back to where we used to be, who we used to feel like... and more importantly the memory of a time forgot, eternal in our minds, yet never again in our hearts?
I know we'll never be together again (don't I deserve it?), and with the burden of guilt that I feel (I know I should have done more, that's the greatest thing about retrospect), but now, without the hassle of such a difficult... such a tense atmosphere of school, exams, and whatever else that might be standing in our way... just maybe this once I can try and make a difference. It's this difference that, in any case-in-point, whichever one I was to choose, makes the difference between distinguishing love and hate.
Quoting:
Oh Bobo....
What can anyone say to that....
It happens, and it will happen again, and it will hurt again. How many times did I find myself in exactly the same situation, and other people here I'm sure.
Try not to be too hard on yourself - second guessing what might have happened can grind away at your soul until there's nothing left - so don't it get that far.
Bobo, my kids are teenagers now so they are not long off facing this situation themselves, and I dread the day when one of them comes to me with this problem, because no words can adequately describe the pain, and there really isn't any worthwhile explanation. And they are going to expect answers.
So I am going to say to them what I have found to be true (yet it will mean nothing to them until it happens) :
Love is found in the most unlikely places, and with people you would never have imagined, and it can hit you like a brick.
It's just that sometimes the wait in between is unbearable.
You offered the full version of your story - if you are serious then I for one would read it.
FussB :)
End Quote