Hockey mom wants daughter allowed in boys' change room
Canada.com
By: Lori-Anne Charlton
07/11/05

VANCOUVER - A Lumby, B.C., mother believes her daughter got the short end of the hockey stick while she was a member of the town's bantam house team, thanks to a B.C. Amateur Hockey Association policy requiring male and female players to change in separate rooms.

Jane Emlyn says female minor hockey players' rights are violated when they're forced to use separate changing rooms.

She's presenting her case to a mediator from the Human Rights Tribunal this morning, facing off against representatives from the B.C. amateur hockey association and the Lumby Minor Hockey Association at the Vernon courthouse.

"There's a lot of girls that play, and I think the majority of them see this as discrimination," Ms. Emlyn said.

According to Al Berg, a member of the B.C. association'- coaching committee, the policy was introduced in January 2001 by Hockey Canada, after a Human Rights Commission mediation session in Ontario. It states players over the age of 11 of different gender are not allowed to change in the same room at the same time. The policy came as a result of increased female participation on integrated teams.

Fourteen-year-old Jewel Emlyn, who plays on the Lumby Stars with two other girls, says being kept out of the changing room before and after games or practice means they miss out on a lot of team camaraderie.

"It's fun in the changing room. You get to talk and socialize with all the kids and talk about the game, and talk about the practices and just discuss hockey. And if you're in a changing room with three people, and there's another team there, it's a little awkward and not fun," she said.

Her mother adds that, while girls are allowed in the room 15 minutes before game time, much of the coaching goes on while players are changing. Female coaches are also banned from the room except during those 15 minutes.

Randy Barton, president of Lumby Minor Hockey, says his association has been fairly relaxed about enforcing the policy. But Ms. Emlyn says she's seen girls forced to change in boiler rooms and storage spaces, sometimes with members of the opposing team.

Ms. Emlyn would prefer shared changing rooms, with a dress code requiring all girls to have a minimum of shorts and T-shirt on, and boys to wear at least boxers. The minority gender would have to leave the room before members of the opposite sex shower.

A similar policy was introduced in New Brunswick last October, after the Human Rights Commission ruled a 14-year-old female player had her rights violated when she was forced to change separately.

If the dress code is followed, players will see less skin in the locker room than they do on the beach.

"We're not just, like, naked, running around," Jewel said, suggesting those who don't feel comfortable in a co-ed locker room could change elsewhere.

The father of one of her female teammates, who asked not to be named, said he's uncomfortable with the idea of his daughter changing in front of a group of boys at this age without a strict policy.

"I know what boys are like at that age," he said.

Ms. Emlyn said most of the youngsters on the team say they're fine with mixed changing rooms, but she has received several anonymous e-mails condemning her petition.

She's also felt a strain in relationships in her small, North Okanagan home town, 25 kilometres east of Vernon. Lumby has been known for its strong, tight-knit hockey community since the early 1900s.

"It's silly that I'm even having to fight this, actually," Ms. Emlyn said.

Link: http://www.canada.com/ottawa/ottawacitizen/news/story.html?id=2aa28604-33b0-4d73-951f-1e5d56eb62f4

She sounds like the same kind of parent that would allow her child to sleepover at Michael Jacksons house...though it's she's the wrong sex for the King Of Molestation....she is very silly....IMHO ::)

She sounds like the same kind of parent that would allow her child to sleepover at Michael Jacksons house...though it's she's the wrong sex for the King Of Molestation....she is very silly....IMHO ::)


Yep, I agree. This is a silly story.

Tanya

Yep, I agree. This is a silly story.

Tanya
Hey! Nice to "See" you, Tanya :)

::)

Hell if i was one of those 14 year old boy's i'd be all for it.

Duh!!! What a freakin Moron, stick a chick in there with a bunch of adolescent lads and see what happens.

Mom could bring a suit under the 14th Amendment, citing Brown vs. Board of Education, which ruled "separate can NEVER be equal," but I guess that wouldn't do too well in Canada!
:D

Journalists must be squirrel 'coz the sure do pick up an awful lot of nuts!

Hell if i was one of those 14 year old boy's i'd be all for it.

Duh!!! What a freakin Moron, stick a chick in there with a bunch of adolescent lads and see what happens.


No, no, no! They just want to socialize after the games is all!  ::)

I wonder how it would play if a mom insisted her fourteen year old son be allowed to avail himself of the girls' facility?
???

Incidentally, I was talking to my old friend Steve from high school some years back.  He revealed to me that he knew darn well he was gay since the age of fourteen.  On the subject of how he felt about gym, he asked me how I would have liked to be able to change and shower in the girls' lockerroom!
;D

She sounds like the same kind of parent that would allow her child to sleepover at Michael Jacksons house...though it's she's the wrong sex for the King Of Molestation....she is very silly....IMHO ::)


Can you imagine if this where wrestling?  Don't know if your son had to or not, but there were times when underware removeal was necessary for me to make weight.


Silly woman? Naw not yet, when she demands that her daughter should be allowed to shower with the boys as well, then I'll start worrying!

Funny how they made a big deal at the natatorium when I wanted to change in the girls dressing room.....what's wrong with that..I'm older and have seen pictures in magazines without laughing?? ??? ??? ??? :D :D

I really don't get this woman...I think that the coach should be wise and hold talks in a separate room. A fourteen year old girl said this in my local newpaper.

This is just STUPID!!!  I'd bet $$ that if the girl WAS allowed in the boys' locker room and one of them so much as LOOKED at her sideways, she'd be suing over that.   COMMON SENSE PEOPLE!!!


And a judge would most likely award to the prosecution.

I think in my opinion guys and girls should have 1 locker room to change.So what? I've seen them all.What's the big deal that guys and girls cant shower together? I have no problem with that at all. ;D

I think in my opinion guys and girls should have 1 locker room to change.So what? I've seen them all.What's the big deal that guys and girls cant shower together? I have no problem with that at all. ;D


We got some really good looking girls up at college. I know what your feeling ;)

Then again, they'd be looking at me too,  :P

We got some really good looking girls up at college. I know what your feeling ;)

Then again, they'd be looking at me too,  :P



What's to look and stare at? We're all naked when we undress anyway.I may not have an Arnold Shwartzenegger body but at least it's decent enough to look at. ;D

What's to look and stare at? We're all naked when we undress anyway.I may not have an Arnold Shwartzenegger body but at least it's decent enough to look at. ;D


ROFLMAO... ;D

Things just sorta happen when boys and girls get together naked.  Apparently, the "nudist" culture has all sorts of social codes about "not staring" and if anybody becomes aroused, that person (usually a guy!) is ostracized.  But the nudists are always on about how "nudity" is perfectly natural and wearing clothes is unnatural.  Pretty silly if you ask me!

I believe that boys and girls should undress together & shower together.How about a Unisex lockeroom? ;D

I believe that boys and girls should undress together & shower together.How about a Unisex lockeroom? ;D


I doubt that would cause problems.

Seriously, as liberal as I may be... Perhaps there are some guys on the team who wouldn't be comfortable undressing and showering with a female present. Maybe they're self-conscious about their special no-no places. One must think of their feelings too.

That being said, I have no problem with co-ed locker rooms and showers as long as people can be trusted to behave ( ;D). Otherwise, there is no problem with putting the sexes asunder and keeping things the way they are in that department.

I believe that boys and girls should undress together & shower together.How about a Unisex lockeroom? ;D


Nah, that'd be just a bit too awkward, I think.. plus, some people are disrespectful and might harass, and then.. well, when hormones get out of control.. I think you know.

The solution is for each person to have his/her own changing room and shower.  That way the homophobes won't have to worry about other boys or other girls looking at their special 'no-no-zones', moralists won't have to worry about anyone's sexuality being corrupted, and stupid-ass-never-should-have-been-allowed-to-be parents will have to find something else to get media attention about.

Let's not forget that these are 14-ish y.o. kids and they do not really understand how to control their hormones.  This mom is just ASKING for trouble ::)


I guess the plan is to win the case, and then turn around and sue the school for creating a sexually-charged atmosphere.

???

I guess the plan is to win the case, and then turn around and sue the school for creating a sexually-charged atmosphere.

???


The sad thing is, that COULD be true.  :-\\

Nah, that'd be just a bit too awkward, I think.. plus, some people are disrespectful and might harass, and then.. well, when hormones get out of control.. I think you know.



Well,If people were more respectful then guys and girls wouldn't have to stare at each other's private parts. ;D

Seriously, as liberal as I may be... Perhaps there are some guys on the team who wouldn't be comfortable undressing and showering with a female present. Maybe they're self-conscious about their special no-no places. One must think of their feelings too.

That being said, I have no problem with co-ed locker rooms and showers as long as people can be trusted to behave ( ;D). Otherwise, there is no problem with putting the sexes asunder and keeping things the way they are in that department.





I have no problem at all getting undressed with a female present.What have they seen that they've never seen before? ;D

Hell if i was one of those 14 year old boy's i'd be all for it.

Duh!!! What a freakin Moron, stick a chick in there with a bunch of adolescent lads and see what happens.


Of course, if she wins she may have yet another lawsuit in about a year.  Sueing the team for making it possible for her daughter to get pregnant.

This is the kind of situation where you can't win.  This is the kind of mother that lives in a fantasyland, where OJ and MJ are innocent, and adolescents are just small adults.

Of course, if she wins she may have yet another lawsuit in about a year.  Sueing the team for making it possible for her daughter to get pregnant.

This is the kind of situation where you can't win.  This is the kind of mother that lives in a fantasyland, where OJ and MJ are innocent, and adolescents are just small adults.

X male members of the hockey time divided by $X monthly child support = (you do the math)
:-X

Small adults?  Have you seen the size of some of these teenage leviathans hanging around the shopping malls?

Howard wrote:
I believe that boys and girls should undress together & shower together.How about a Unisex lockeroom?
Uni = all together, all acting as one + sex = what you'd end up with!

Crazymom wrote:
Let's not forget that these are 14-ish y.o. kids and they do not really understand how to control their hormones.  This mom is just ASKING for trouble
If you understand how to control YOUR hormones, let me in on it, heck, write a book on it .  You'd win the Nobel prize and become a zillionaire!
OK, 14 year olds are randy, but, I mean, if you put a bunch of 28 year old (or 56 year old!) men and women in showering together, you'd end up with a bunch of hanky-panky going around!
::)

If they're small adults, co-ed changing rooms are somehow more acceptable?  ???

Well,If people were more respectful then guys and girls wouldn't have to stare at each other's private parts. ;D


So, then what's the point? All you're doing is creating an environment in which people have the potential to be more disrespectful. You always have jerks, might as well not give 'em fodder.

X male members of the hockey time divided by $X monthly child support = (you do the math)
:-X

Small adults?  Have you seen the size of some of these teenage leviathans hanging around the shopping malls?

Howard wrote:Uni = all together, all acting as one + sex = what you'd end up with!

Crazymom wrote:If you understand how to control YOUR hormones, let me in on it, heck, write a book on it .  You'd win the Nobel prize and become a zillionaire!
OK, 14 year olds are randy, but, I mean, if you put a bunch of 28 year old (or 56 year old!) men and women in showering together, you'd end up with a bunch of hanky-panky going around!
::)

I can control (meaning, I don't ACT on them)my hormones any time I want to....trust me, if I didn't, there are days I'd NEVER get out of bed ;)   Most 14 y.o. don't have that much self control....

I can control (meaning, I don't ACT on them)my hormones any time I want to....trust me, if I didn't, there are days I'd NEVER get out of bed ;)   Most 14 y.o. don't have that much self control....


I, being 14, have a lot of control... but if there were constantly girls my age stripping naked around me, that just might change.  ;D

X male members of the hockey time divided by $X monthly child support = (you do the math)
:-X

Small adults?  Have you seen the size of some of these teenage leviathans hanging around the shopping malls?

Howard wrote:Uni = all together, all acting as one + sex = what you'd end up with!

Crazymom wrote:If you understand how to control YOUR hormones, let me in on it, heck, write a book on it .  You'd win the Nobel prize and become a zillionaire!
OK, 14 year olds are randy, but, I mean, if you put a bunch of 28 year old (or 56 year old!) men and women in showering together, you'd end up with a bunch of hanky-panky going around!
::)



And Tommy James and his Shondells would singing "My Baby does the hanky panky"

Hell if i was one of those 14 year old boy's i'd be all for it.

Duh!!! What a freakin Moron, stick a chick in there with a bunch of adolescent lads and see what happens.

I think this is a very accurate statement.

If this were, ya know, little kids (under 10) it might be alright. However, if this woman really thinks that a 14 year old girl in the male changing room is completely innocent or that they would just "talk about the game" etc, she's either living in the wrong century or on the wrong planet. I'd wager both.

I can only speak with absolute clarity from my own POV - as a guy who was 14 nine years ago. Now, I've always been a pretty nice, respectful guy - if I were in that situation, I certainly wouldn't gawk or try to see them any way I "shouldn't". But come on, when you're around the opposite sex (especially at that pubescent age) you can't say you wouldn't (even ACCIDENTALLY) on gut reflex look for just a brief second or something.

^ Now, if that's coming from a nice innocent guy like me, think of the good number of boys that age who can be real jerks in that respect (though not necesarilly through any fault of their own, they're just being human in that respect too). Most would be like Beavis & Butthead - that's just reality.

I also think the mom should respect her daughter's feelings in this case - would she feel comfortable changing around a ton of guys her age? Seeing them in that way, or them possibly seeing her? I would personally be shocked if the answer was yes.

Again, from my own POV, I would not have gone into a uni changing room at that age (or even today) if I had the choice. H_ll, I tried really hard to get out of doing regular PE in High School just so I wouldn't have to change with the other guys!

(I probably could set a world record for "fastest changing time" too! ;D )

But I think it would be great.If both guys and girls had one lockerroom then that means we guys wouldn't have to drill a hole through the wall and peek in like in the movie Porky's. ;D ;)

is the hockey girl hot?



I only hope so. ;D

is the hockey girl hot?


Probably not, that's why the mom has to sue to force the boys to allow her in the changing room.

It states players over the age of 11 of different gender are not allowed to change in the same room at the same time.

Umm....what happens if they're under 11?

They're just going to be changing.I mean it's not like we're going to be staring at each other's privates and laughing at them.I think it's harmless.

I can only speak with absolute clarity from my own POV - as a guy who was 14 nine years ago. Now, I've always been a pretty nice, respectful guy - if I were in that situation, I certainly wouldn't gawk or try to see them any way I "shouldn't". But come on, when you're around the opposite sex (especially at that pubescent age) you can't say you wouldn't (even ACCIDENTALLY) on gut reflex look for just a brief second or something.


Hell, i know i'd be staring away if i was one of those guys. The little dollar signs would be appearing in front of your eyes.. 'JACKPOT!'.

It doesn't matter if she's really hot.  Boys and girls will want to look at each other anyway, just like men and women.

X male members of the hockey time divided by $X monthly child support = (you do the math)
:-X


Which brings up another puzzle: who is responsible for child support when the father is a minor?  Normally, that would be the parent.


Small adults?  Have you seen the size of some of these teenage leviathans hanging around the shopping malls?


I mean that in the generic sense.  By the time I was 12 I was bigger then my mother, and by 16 I was bigger then my father.  But I had nowhere near the self-restraint or maturity of them.

I had a gf about 12 years ago with a 2 year old daughter.  She was against "corporal punishment", and the child was a terror.  Running away from her in parking lots, grabbing knives in the kitchen and running through the house with them.  She would try and try to reason with her, telling her that was bad.  I told her I would not deal with it that way if it did not work, and over the next few months, she had stopped most of this behavior.  It is amazing what a single swat on the bottom of a 2 year old will do, when talking does no good.She still fussed at me when I did it, but I was not living in the same house as a 2 year old that did things that were dangerous to herself and others.

I myself treat children as adults, when they deserve it.  But when they act like children (especially spoiled children), that is exactly how I treat them.  And if this mother thinks that in this situation they would not act like children, she id deluding herself.

How about a compromise mom?  Set up a "meeting room" for the teem to gather in after they get ready for the game?  Simply forbid any conversaion about the game from the locker room, and make all team discussions happen where everybody can participate?

If they made one lockerroom for guys and girls,I'd love to get undressed in front of women,I'm not ashamed of my body(well maybe just a little) ;D

Number 1 - The mother is an idiot.
Number 2 - Forced inclusion is wrong. Why do people have to feel like they have to be accepted and loved by everyone else? Get a life. Get a job. Join a girl hockey team and shut the hell up. What a pathetic society.
Number 3 - The mother is an idiot.

If they made one lockerroom for guys and girls,I'd love to get undressed in front of women,I'm not ashamed of my body(well maybe just a little) ;D

Hmmmm, the girls are 14, Howard!  ::)  My daughter is 16 and I say, no way! The mother is nuts! What's the point? What's she trying to prove? I'm a pretty open minded person, but I think it's bad idea for everyone involved.

Hmmmm, the girls are 14, Howard!  ::)  My daughter is 16 and I say, no way! The mother is nuts! What's the point? What's she trying to prove? I'm a pretty open minded person, but I think it's bad idea for everyone involved.



Well,If they're 14 years of age,then I'd say never mind they wouldn't want to see this beautiful hunk ;D

Somehow this topic makes me think of the shower scene in "Starship Troopers." (Like that'll ever happen!)

Star ship trooper,  great movie.

      not for that part though!!!!!

also i dis agree with the whole co- ed locker room thing.  i fully agree with soccer mom.  and i think howard is a bit perverted!!!!!
LOL  jk howard

and i think howard is a bit perverted!!!!!
LOL  jk howard

We all KNOW He's a bit perverted.  ;D

If they made one lockerroom for guys and girls,I'd love to get undressed in front of women,I'm not ashamed of my body(well maybe just a little) ;D


(Well maybe just a little)  ;)  I think a  lot of people feel that way.

HAhahahahaha    lol wow  we should make a topic out of this one!!!!!!!!        ;D

Somehow this topic makes me think of the shower scene in "Starship Troopers." (Like that'll ever happen!)


Did'nt you know?  Co-ed showers are all the rage in the future.  Look at the new version of Battlestar Galactica and you see them too.  Of course, this is a TV show, so instead of nude, the girls are wearing tanktops instead of their birthday suits.   8)

We all KNOW He's a bit perverted.  ;D



Maybe if the girls were 10-15 years older then I'd probably undress in front of them,maybe. ;D

Did'nt you know?  Co-ed showers are all the rage in the future.  Look at the new version of Battlestar Galactica and you see them too.  Of course, this is a TV show, so instead of nude, the girls are wearing tanktops instead of their birthday suits.  8)
And they cleverly substitute the word "frack" for it's more vulgar, real-life counterpart. :D