'ALEX' NOT SO GREAT
By ALY SUJO


November 27, 2004 --

"Shlockbuster!" "Borefest!" "Trainwreck!"
Oliver Stone's gay sand-and-sandal epic "Alexander" got a thorough critical roasting for its Thanksgiving opening — and Times Square moviegoers yesterday seemed equally allergic to the toga turkey.

Dubbed a work of artistic suicide by most critics, the $155-million flick appeared to be headed for the box-office abyss after a limp wristed Wednesday/Thursday take of just over $8 million.

"It's ****** garbage," a bewildered Benny Fosco, 28, said after seeing the film at Loews E-Walk yesterday. "I want my money back. This is a hype. Phony as heck."

The Warner Brothers release stirred controversy when it emerged that the film — starring Irish hunk Colin Farrell as Alexander the Great — openly portrays his passionate gay love affair with Hephaiston, played by Jared Leto.

Fosco, who had not heard about the controversy, said Leto's Irish-like accent and Angelina Jolie's vaguely Russian one were "quite ludicrous."


Even Stone — whose "Platoon" and "JFK" are considered top-grade Hollywood dramas — admitted that "Alexander" was a risky gamble that would likely be overwhelmed by family fare such as "The Incredibles."

"It's insane," he cackled to a reporter recently. "What the hell can I tell you? It's a crazy thing." He even said he thinks "Alexander" will be a flop "because it's so expensive."


The online publication Box Office Mojo said the nearly three-hour-long film took in just $8.2 million in its first two days.

"That's soft for a megabudget epic," said Mojo chief Brandon Gray.

"It's downhill from here," he told the Post. "It's not a crowd-pleaser. Poor word-of-mouth coupled with critics who smell blood — it's like the Perfect Storm' of turkeydom."

If there's anything we've learned, it's that films with guys running around in togas just don't do well at the American box office.  Never has and never will.  Movies about gladiators?  Fine.  Everyone likes gladiator movies.  Give Russell Crowe or Charlton Heston an Oscar.

But not movies with guys in togas.  I knew this film would bomb just like that Troy movie that Brad Pitt did earlier in the year.

i'm still going to watch it for the battle scenes. i'm a fan of ancient warfare and history.

It was overdramatic and TOO DAMN LONG!

If there's anything we've learned, it's that films with guys running around in togas just don't do well at the American box office.  Never has and never will.  Movies about gladiators?  Fine.  Everyone likes gladiator movies.  Give Russell Crowe or Charlton Heston an Oscar.



   Oh yeah?  Could it be that these works made the journey successfully from screenplay to screen because there is a market for them?  Hollywood is not in the business of backing losing horses.  That some movies bomb is largely unforseeable...

   "Sword and Sandal" movies never have done well?  Not only is there a market for them, but many have been re-made, time and time again...

   Ben Hur (1907, 1925, 1959)
   Spartacus (1954, 1960)
   El Cid (1961)
   Gladiator (2000)
   Braveheart (1995)
   Cleopatra (1912, 1917, 1920, 1928, 1934, 1962, 1963)
   The Fall of the Roman Empire (1964)
   Satyricon (1969)
   The Ten Commandments (1923, 1956)
   King Of Kings (1927, 1961)
   Quo Vadis? (1951)
   The Robe (1953)
   The Scorpion King (2002)
   The Last Temptation of Christ (1988)
   Julius Caesar (1908, 1911, 1950, 1953, 1970)
   Alexander the Great (1956)
   The Mummy (1999)
   The Mummy Returns (2001)

   I could go on...not counting made for T.V. mini-series/epics...

Blame it on Sideways. That movie is doing quite well. Hopefully it will make it's way to mainstream theaters soon.
I saw it at an arthouse theater yesterday.

i'm a fan of ancient warfare and history.


  As am I...particullarly the late 1st C. BCE - late 1st C. CE Roman Army.  I have a library on various aspects of Rome's military complex here in the house...

  I've always said history can be just as, if not more, fascinating than fiction...

'ALEX' NOT SO GREAT
By ALY SUJO


November 27, 2004 --

"Shlockbuster!" "Borefest!" "Trainwreck!"
Oliver Stone's gay sand-and-sandal epic "Alexander" got a thorough critical roasting for its Thanksgiving opening — and Times Square moviegoers yesterday seemed equally allergic to the toga turkey.

Dubbed a work of artistic suicide by most critics, the $155-million flick appeared to be headed for the box-office abyss after a limp wristed Wednesday/Thursday take of just over $8 million.

"It's ****** garbage," a bewildered Benny Fosco, 28, said after seeing the film at Loews E-Walk yesterday. "I want my money back. This is a hype. Phony as heck."

The Warner Brothers release stirred controversy when it emerged that the film — starring Irish hunk Colin Farrell as Alexander the Great — openly portrays his passionate gay love affair with Hephaiston, played by Jared Leto.

Fosco, who had not heard about the controversy, said Leto's Irish-like accent and Angelina Jolie's vaguely Russian one were "quite ludicrous."


Even Stone — whose "Platoon" and "JFK" are considered top-grade Hollywood dramas — admitted that "Alexander" was a risky gamble that would likely be overwhelmed by family fare such as "The Incredibles."

"It's insane," he cackled to a reporter recently. "What the hell can I tell you? It's a crazy thing." He even said he thinks "Alexander" will be a flop "because it's so expensive."


The online publication Box Office Mojo said the nearly three-hour-long film took in just $8.2 million in its first two days.

"That's soft for a megabudget epic," said Mojo chief Brandon Gray.

"It's downhill from here," he told the Post. "It's not a crowd-pleaser. Poor word-of-mouth coupled with critics who smell blood — it's like the Perfect Storm' of turkeydom."







Wow.... the film must really blow chunks.. badly!!!!  ::)  ;D I still want to go see it..

Blame it on Sideways. That movie is doing quite well. Hopefully it will make it's way to mainstream theaters soon.
I saw it at an arthouse theater yesterday.


The new Spongebob movie, National Treasure, and The Incredibles are also gonna kick this film's (Alexander) a** s well. It doesn't stand a chance in hell of being a hit, good luck Oliver Stone, you'll need it!

This just in.......

'Alexander' Fails to Conquer U.S. Box Office
Sunday November 28 1:03 PM ET

Conquering much of the world was a piece of cake for Alexander the Great. Conquering the North American box office is another thing.

"Alexander," director Oliver Stone's three-hour epic starring Irishman Colin Farrell as the youthful Macedonian warrior, opened at No. 6 with ticket sales of just $13.5 million for the three days beginning on Friday.

Since opening on Wednesday to get a jump-start on the U.S. Thanksgiving holiday, the film has earned $21.6 million. The independently financed film, a dream project of Stone's for 15 years, reportedly cost more than $150 million to make.

Warner Bros. Pictures., a unit of Time Warner Inc ., paid $35 million for North American rights from the film's producer, Intermedia Films, a unit of Munich-based IM Internationalmedia AG .

Nicolas Cage 's action-adventure "National Treasure" was No. 1 for a second weekend with $33.1 million, followed by the animated superhero saga "The Incredibles" with $24.1 million. Both were distributed by Walt Disney Co., with the latter produced by Pixar Animation Studios Inc .

"Christmas with the Kranks," a holiday comedy starring Tim Allen and Jamie Lee Curtis , opened at No. 3 with $22.7 million for the three days and a better-than-expected $32.0 million since its Wednesday bow. The film was distributed by Columbia Pictures, a unit of Sony Corp . .

"The Polar Express" held steady at No. 4 with $20.1 million in its third weekend, taking its total to $82.2 million. The Christmas cartoon was distributed by Warner Bros., which evenly split the $170 million production budget and marketing costs with real-estate heir Steve Bing.

Kids cartoon "The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie" fell three places to No. 5 with $17.8 million, for a 10-day total of $58.6 million. The film was distributed by Paramount Pictures, a unit of Viacom Inc .

http://movies.yahoo.com/news/va/20041128/110167582600.html

Can you say..... BOMB?  ::)  :D

The current film box office.....

1.  National Treasure
2.  The Incredibles
3.  Christmas with the Kranks
4.  The Polar Express
5.  The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie
6.  Alexander
7.  Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason
8.  Finding Neverland
9.  Ray
10.  After the Sunset

And here is what some of the critics have to say about Alexander....

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/alexander/

I have no interest in an overblown epic adventure such as "Alexander."  It is too wrapped up in Hollywood glamor to deliver genuine history.  Anyway, the great leaders and the great battles are not the most interesting aspects of history for me.

Anyway, I ain't going to no "Sideways" neither.

Last night I took my gal to see "The Motorcycle Diaries" at a local indie cinema.  The film is wonderful for the first half, second half drags a bit.

I have no interest in an overblown epic adventure such as "Alexander."  It is too wrapped up in Hollywood glamor to deliver genuine history.  Anyway, the great leaders and the great battles are not the most interesting aspects of history for me.

Anyway, I ain't going to no "Sideways" neither.

Last night I took my gal to see "The Motorcycle Diaries" at a local indie cinema.  The film is wonderful for the first half, second half drags a bit.


Better off seeing Gladiator and The Lord of The Rings movies again, I guess.

I don't like long "epic" or gladiator movies other than "Ben Hur" or "Jesus of Nazareth". So the "disappointment" of "Alexander" proves there is a God and He is great, not Alexander (sorry Philbo).

I usually watch anything that Val Kilmer is in, but I have no desire to see this one.  I just don't care for Colin Farrell.  I don't like his acting style.

I want to see Finding Neverland.

Anyway, I ain't going to no "Sideways" neither.


It's actually quite a good film. You just have to endure 3 akward scenes of nudity is all.
Alexander Payne is an... interesting director, to say the least.

And about 3 hours of needless talk, violence and togas. ::)
It's actually quite a good film. You just have to endure 3 akward scenes of nudity is all.
Alexander Payne is an... interesting director, to say the least.

I would not mind seeing a movie about Alexander the Great.

But who wants to go see a movie that has two guys getting it on? ???

That's why it is bombing.

And about 3 hours of needless talk, violence and togas. ::)


I was talking about Sideways and the director of Sideways Alexander Payne, not the movie Alexander.

Alexander not even worth the time and effort to DL on my computer.  And wait don't forget it's a waste of hard drive space too. 


TMD RULEZ

'ALEX' NOT SO GREAT

Oliver Stone's gay sand-and-sandal epic "Alexander" got a thorough critical roasting for its Thanksgiving opening — and Times Square moviegoers yesterday seemed equally allergic to the toga turkey.




Now, if ATG was directed not by Oliver Stone, but by Mel Gibson, and it didn't imply Alexander was bisexual, but made him a straight arrow through and through, conservatives whould be ga-ga for the movie no matter what kind of silly piece of crap* it was.

*like  Mel's The Passion of the Christ.

I would not mind seeing a movie about Alexander the Great.

But who wants to go see a movie that has two guys getting it on? ???

That's why it is bombing.


That is exactly it.

I was tempted to title this thread: "Queer-themed Alexander is bombing out!," but didn't because it might *offend* somebody, somehow.

I would not mind seeing a movie about Alexander the Great.

But who wants to go see a movie that has two guys getting it on? ???

That's why it is bombing.

It depends on the context of the "two guys getting it on"?  Two movies I enjoyed in my youth, "Prick Up Your Ears," and "My Beautiful Launderette" were about gay relationships, but I liked them because they were good movies, and no, they didn't attract me to the "lifestyle."  Other "gay" themed movies I had no use for were "The Bird Cage," and "The Crying Game."  Those movies were widely acclaimed.  I just didn't like them, that's all.  Now, if you're homophobic, that's your problem.

It depends on the context of the "two guys getting it on"?  Two movies I enjoyed in my youth, "dweeb Up Your Ears," and "My Beautiful Launderette" were about gay relationships, but I liked them because they were good movies, and no, they didn't attract me to the "lifestyle."  Other "gay" themed movies I had no use for were "The Bird Cage," and "The Crying Game."  Those movies were widely acclaimed.  I just didn't like them, that's all.  Now, if you're homophobic, that's your problem.



I'm not homophobic.

I just don't want to spend hard-earned movie money watching two guys getting it on.  :P

I'm not homophobic.

I just don't want to spend hard-earned movie money watching two guys getting it on.  :P


Same.