Quoting:
Three bears dated Goldilocks in a bathtub going skinning dipping and their mother turned envious.
End Quote

Can we change phrases?
Three bears did Goldilocks in a bathtub going skinny dipping and their mother turned envious.

Quoting:
Grizzly Adams ate cherries in a Suburu going tobacco dipping, and his beard turned plaid.

End Quote

Grizzly Adams ate cherries in a Subaru going tobacco planting, and his beard turned plaid.

Quoting:
Santa Claus crushed fried Parramatta Eels in a blender salivating about cover girls and his trousers were open :o
End Quote

Is this the man we want delivering toys to our children....? ::)

Quoting:


Is this the man we want delivering toys to our children....? ::)
End Quote

Perhaps this is from the verse that "Wierd Al" Yankovic cut out of "The Night Santa Went Crazy" on the advice of his recording company's lawyers... ;D

Quoting:
Santa Claus crushed fried Parramatta Eels in a blender salivating about spanking girls and his trousers were open  
End Quote

Oh my innocent eyes!!!!!!  :o

Quoting:
Santa Claus crushed fried Parramatta Eels in a blender salivating about spanking girls and his trousers were open  
End Quote

¡Ay, caramba!  :o

Quoting:
Hugh Heffner crushed fried Parramatta Eels in a Bus Shelter salivating about spanking girls and his trousers were open. ;)
End Quote

Hugh Heffner crushed limestone in a bus shelter salivating about spanking girls and his trousers were open.
Hey Fussy, I was late, but it worked out fine :D

Quoting:
Hugh Heffner crushed limestone in a bus shelter salivating about spanking Santa Claus and his trousers were open.  :o
End Quote

That one is so absolutely perfect how could we even think of changing it....? ::)

Quoting:
Hugh Heffner crushed limestone in a bus shelter salivating about spanking Santa Claus and his trousers were open.  :o
End Quote

LMAO!!!!!!

Quoting:
Hugh Heffner crushed limestone in a rock quarry salivating about spanking Santa Claus and his trousers were on fire.
End Quote

Just when you thought it couldn't get any better... ::)

Quoting:
Mrs. Claus rode camels in the ballroom while humping Santa Claus and his lips were on Donner and Blitzen.


End Quote

Saddam rode camels in the ballroom while humping Santa Clause and his lips were on Donner and Blitzen.

Quoting:Regis Philbin grilled white tigers in the kitchen while Wilma, Betty, Dire Straits and his lips were on Siegfried and Roy. End Quote

Regis Philbin grilled white tigers in the kitchen while Wilma,Betty,Dire Straits and their lips were on Seigfreid and Roy.

Quoting:


Regis Philbin slapped Kathie Lee in the kitchen while Wilma, Betty, Mr. Slate and their hips were on Barney and Fred.

End Quote

Regis Philbin slapped Kathie Lee in the mouth while Wilma, Betty, Mr. Slate and their hips were on Barney and Fred.

Quoting:
Regis Philbin slapped Bruce Lee in the mouth while Wilma, Ned Beatty, Mr. Slate and their friends were on Barney Fife.
End Quote

Regis Philbin slapped Bruce Lee in the mouth because Wilma, Ned Beatty, Mr. Slate and their friends were on Barney Fife.

Quoting:
Regis Philbin shot Bruce Johnstone in the head, because Wilma, Ned Beatty, Mr. Slate and their friends were on Barney Miller.
End Quote

Regis Philbin shot Bruce Johnstone in the head because Wilma, Ned Beatty, Mr. Slate and their friends were on crack.

Quoting:
Frodo Baggins punched Bruce Willis in the head because The Three Stooges and their agents were on crack.
End Quote

Frodo Baggins punched Bruce Willis in the head because The Three Stooges and their agents were on television

Quoting:
Jackie Onassis fondled Michelle Pfieffer on the backside assuming Diane Ladd and the Ozark Mountain Daredevils were eating at the Kentucky Derby
End Quote