This post is about a bunch of question that my friend Jackie jus has to know the answers to...

~Why does your nose run, and your feet smell?

~Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs?

~If a turtle doesnt have a shell is it homeless or just naked?

~If a cow laughed would milk come out her nose?

~Why isnt there mouse flavored cat food?

~What is the speed of Dark?

~When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?

~When someone asks you, "a penny for your thought" and you put your two cents in...where's the other penny?

   Just a few things we were wondering...hope u can help me figure them out.... ::)

::)

This post is about a bunch of question that my friend Jackie jus has to know the answers to...

~Why does your nose run, and your feet smell?

~Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs?

~If a turtle doesnt have a shell is it homeless or just naked?

~If a cow laughed would milk come out her nose?

~Why isnt there mouse flavored cat food?

~What is the speed of Dark?

~When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?

~When someone asks you, "a penny for your thought" and you put your two cents in...where's the other penny?

  Just a few things we were wondering...hope u can help me figure them out.... ::)


Yes  ::) but I'll answer for the fun of it.

1. Cos it's always running late for appointments. Cos you don't wash them properly.

2. No, cos society doesn't value dogs as much as humans

3. It would be...dead  :\'(

4. ditto

5. How do you know it isn't?  ;)

6. Dark is everywhere. So infinity.

7. green

8. up their arse

has the oracle enlightened you?  :D

~When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?




Bright red.  There is a classic dutch cartoon showing this

~where are preperations A through G?

~If the "blackbox" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole damn airplane made out of that stuff?

~How do blind people know when they are done wiping?

~Can you cry under water?

~How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

~If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

~Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?

~Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...but it's only a "penny >for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

~Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

~Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

~What did cured ham actually have?

~How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

~Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

~If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

~If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?

~Why are you IN a movie, but you are ON TV?

~Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

~How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America?

~Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

~If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?

~Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

The answers are simple, my Disciple of Bobby Jimmy & the Critters:

-Yes, but don't cry & pee in the pool at once.
-At least important enough to have a cult song or movie line written after them.
-For the same reason you drive in a parkway, and park in a driveway.
-Geometrical pleasure.
-Stagflation...or Sally Struthers, instead of to those kids she sponsors!
-I believe that when we get there, clothing is optional.
-So you can pay with rectangular money.
-Hoof & mouth disease.
-Because that little car they took to the Moon resembled a luggage rack.
-Somebody farted???
-They DO have translators, you know.
-No, you're sent to the R.C. (Recycling Center)
-Because the TV is more comfortable than a film projector- burn-a you oss!!!
-Becuase they're stupid.
-Presidents don't look as good in a bikini.
-They same reason they wear masks- that way, you don't know who to blame.
-Round Table Pizza, usually.
-One chest, two 'cheeks'.

This post is about a bunch of question that my friend Jackie jus has to know the answers to...

~Why does your nose run, and your feet smell?

~Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs?

~If a turtle doesnt have a shell is it homeless or just naked?

~If a cow laughed would milk come out her nose?

~Why isnt there mouse flavored cat food?

~What is the speed of Dark?

~When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?

~When someone asks you, "a penny for your thought" and you put your two cents in...where's the other penny?


Cause Dom is a homo.

Cause Dom is a homo.
that's your answer to everything!

~When someone asks you, "a penny for your thought" and you put your two cents in...where's the other penny?


Cut to a small board meeting. An accountant stands up an reads...
Accountant Lady Chairman, sir, shareholders, ladies and gentlemen. I have great pleasure in announcing that owing to a cutback on surplus expenditure of twelve million Canadian dollars, plus a refund of seven and a half million Deutschmarks from the Swiss branch, and in addition adding the debenture preference stock of the three and three quarter million to the directors' reserve currency account of seven and a half million, plus an upward expenditure margin of eleven and a half thousand lira, due to a rise in capital investment of ten million pounds, this firm last year made a complete profit of a shilling.
Chairman A shilling Wilkins?
Accountant Er, roughly, yes sir.
Chairman Wilkins, I am the Chairman of a multi-million pound corporation and you are a very new chartered Accountant. Isn't it possible there may have been some mistake?
Accountant Well that's very kind of you sir, but I don't think I'm ready to be Chairman yet.
Board Member Wilkins, Wilkins. This shilling, is it net or gross?
Accountant It's British sir.
Chairman Yes, has tax been paid on it?
Accountant Yes, this is after tax. Owing to the rigorous bite of the income tax five pence of a further sixpence was swallowed up in tax.
Board Member Five pence of a further sixpence?
Accountant (eagerly) Yes sir.
Chairman Five pence of a further sixpence?
Accountant That's right sir.
Chairman Then where is the other penny?
Accountant ... Er.
Board Member That makes you a penny short Wilkins. Where is it?
Accountant ... Erm.
Chairman Wilkins?
Accountant (in tears) I embezzled it sir.
Chairman What all of it?
Accountant Yes all of it.
Board Member You naughty person.
Accountant It's my first. Please be gentle with me.
Chairman I'm afraid it's my unpleasant duty to inform you that you're fired.
Accountant Oh please, please.
Chairman No, out!
Accountant (crying) Oh ... (he leaves)
Chairman Yes, there's no place for sentiment in big business.
He goes over to a wall plaque 'There is no place for sentiment in Big Business'. He turns it over. On the back it says 'He's right you know'.
Bishop (to Chairman) Oh you're no fun anymore.

that's your answer to everything!


WHO TOLD YOU?!?!

Oooooohhhhh...the General got busted!!!!!!!

(snicker, heh, heh, heh, a-heh)

"Chairman    Wilkins, I am the Chairman of a multi-million pound corporation and you are a very new chartered Accountant. Isn't it possible there may have been some mistake?
Accountant    Well that's very kind of you sir, but I don't think I'm ready to be Chairman yet."

i was just struck anew with the sheer hilarity of this.

All very good questions on this thread!! (I dont know any of the answers http://img215.imageshack.us/img215/2427/biggrinp.gif)